(My family is using a company for our cell phones, who in turn use a national carrier to actually provide the cell service. For a number of reasons — of their doing — we decide to close our account and change companies. We receive a last bill demanding “immediate payment,” which only offers the ability to pay online, in person at a store, or by calling a listed phone number — no mailing address. I attempt to pay online, but am not able to, as I don’t have an “active phone.” I decide to pay in person. This is the sequence of events, as I attempt to PAY my last bill. At the store:)

Me: “I need to pay our bill. We no longer have an active phone with you, so I couldn’t pay online.”

Customer Service Person #1: *looks up my information* “I’m sorry, but we cannot take your money. We no longer handle bills for [National Carrier] you were using. You can only pay by phone.”

(I go home and call the phone number on the bill.)

Me: “I need to pay our last bill. We don’t have an active phone, so I couldn’t pay online, and the person at [Store] said they no longer collect bills for [National Carrier].”

(I give him the account and the disconnected phone number.)

Customer Service Person #2: *collects my information from me* “I’m sorry, but we cannot take your money. We also no longer handle bills for [National Carrier], either. You have to call your old carrier.”

Me: “I have only ever used you to pay my bill. This is the only phone number on my bill, and I don’t have a [National Carrier] number. I have no one else to call, and I just need to pay my last bill.”

Customer Service Person #2: “Let put you on hold, so I can talk to my supervisor.”

(He disconnects me instead. I call back, and explain the entire story again.)

Customer Service Person #3: *recollects my information* “Let me put you on hold, so I can figure out what to do.”

(Five to ten minutes go by.)

Customer Service Person #3: “Unfortunately, you will have to call [National Carrier] to pay this bill, as we cannot take your money for [National Carrier].”

(However, this time she gives me a number to call which is not on the bill. I call the new number, which uses the exact same menu navigation, making me think it’s the same place. I explain the entire story again, and include the account and disconnected phone numbers.)

Customer Service Person #4: *collects my information from me* “I’m sorry, but I cannot take your money without an active phone. Once we suspend your phone for non-payment, you have to pay in person at [Store].”

Me: “Listen. It wasn’t suspended for non-payment. I cancelled my account with you, and this is my last bill with you. As I told you, the store already told me they couldn’t take my money, and that I could only pay over the phone. All I want to do is pay you what I owe you. Why can’t I pay you if I have the account number and old phone number, and you have access to my account?”

Customer Service Person #4: “Okay, let me put you on with my supervisor.”

(I’m transferred to the supervisor and explain the entire story yet again, with all the account information.)

Supervisor: *she collects my account information again* “I’m sorry, but I cannot take your money without an active phone attached to the account.”

Me: *explains to her entire story for a second time* “I don’t understand why this isn’t enough information to give you the money that I owe you, since [Store] can’t take my money in person.”

Supervisor: “Okay, let me see what I can do.”

(After a few minutes, she comes back on and asks me several new questions. Then she takes my credit card information.)

Supervisor: “Now, then, I must warn you that there is an additional fee, since you paid by phone, instead of paying online or in person.”

(I have had enough!)

Me: “This is ridiculous! I will not pay a fee as if it is some kind of privilege to pay you! You wouldn’t allow me to make my payment online or in person, and are forcing me to pay you by phone! Listen. You have two options: take my money right now for only for the bill total, or I am going to hang up on you and never pay this bill. What can you do? Cut off my already deactivated phone? I cannot believe that you all have refused to take my money.

(She agreed to waive the fee and took only the bill amount. Who knew that trying to actually give someone money would be so hard?!)

(I work at an Alaska-only pet store in a relatively small town; however, since we’re right next to Anchorage, we get a lot of customer flow. Our customers are, for the most part, relatively chill, but some can be quite demanding for no real reason. On this particular day I’m stocking dog food and not really willing to deal with nonsense.)

Me: *stops stocking to acknowledge a customer who happens to be on her phone* “Hello…”

Customer: *cuts me off* “Do you work here?”

Me: “Yes.”

Customer: *phone in one hand, dog leash in the other, kicks a bag of dog food* “I want this dog food.”

Me: “Okay, and you can’t get it because you’re on the phone?”

(Keep in mind I have no problem getting dog food for people who have undergone surgery or are just too old or weak to handle it. We do it every day as a courtesy. However, we are not required to lug food around for fully-capable people.)

Customer: *looks at me and laughs like she can’t believe I asked such a question* “Well, no. I mean, yes, but I’m telling you to.”

Me: *raises my eyebrow* “Righhhht.” *starts to grab food*

(At that point, the customer realized I was not really happy about stopping what I was doing just because she was lazy, so she told me to forget it and asked for my name and walked away. Of course, she went to complain, and when my team lead came to me, apparently I had “refused” to get her the food and said, “You have two hands; get it yourself.” She even said, “I’ve worked retail before, and that’s just not something you do.” I also learned that she smelled like alcohol that I couldn’t smell due to a sickness I’m getting over. To be honest, if she had at least said, “please,” then I probably would’ve gotten it, but I guess that was too much for her to do.)

My grandmother was a teacher at one of the nearby elementary schools, and at the time she was teaching in this old, wooden building which was located where the playground is now. One day, as she was teaching, a wasp flew in. My grandmother was deathly allergic to wasp stings, so she freaked out, screaming and diving under her desk to avoid it. She ended up writing a note and sent it with a student to the janitor.

The note read, “There’s a wasp in here, and I’m allergic. Come get it!”

The student came back with a reply on the other side of the paper that read, “I know how you feel.”

One of her students killed the wasp for her.

(I work at a popular chain grocery store as a bagger. Most people that come in are fine with plastic bags, or they bring their own, but some people request paper. On this day, a customer comes up and immediately requests paper, to which I oblige. Due to the size of a cereal box that comes through, which is one of the larger ones, I have to put it in sideways, leaving half the bag for the chips, but it’s narrow. I start trying to get the chips in, without squishing them. The customer stares at me while I do this.)

Customer: *mockingly* “Is it really that hard to put chips in a bag?”

Me: “Well, sir, I’m trying to make sure they don’t get squished.”

Customer: “It’s not that hard.”

(By this point I’ve gotten them in, with very little squish-age. He then quickly grabs it and walks away, glaring at me as he goes. My coworker, who was checking, looks at me after he leaves.)

Coworker: “You have to seriously be bored to come into a store just to antagonize a bagger.”

As my grandfather, Bill, had just passed three days earlier, my sister, her husband and I pack in a car for a six-hour drive.

I’m listening to my music and my sister waves to get my attention. She and her husband were talking and her husband had said that my grandmother and all of us should watch Kill Bill.

Took him a second before he realized what he said.