Hugh Do You Think You Are

, , , , , | Right | September 1, 2010

Me: *wrapping up the call* “Thank’s very much, Hugh! Was there anything else?”

Caller: “And what was your name? Oh, Emma, right.”

Me: “My name is Uma.”

Caller: “Yuma?”

Me: “Like Uma Thurman.”

Caller: “Oh, like the actress? Are you as pretty as she is? Do you look like her?”

Me: “No. Do you look like Hugh Grant? Or Hugh Jackman?”

Caller: “Try Hugh Hefner.”


This story is part of the American States roundup!

Want to read the next story? Click here!

Want to read the roundup? Click here!

1 Thumbs
3,249

No ID, No Idea

, , , , , | Right | June 26, 2010

Customer: “So how long will it take to receive my new debit card?”

Me: “Five to seven days.”

Customer: “How will I make sure no one uses my card?”

Me: “Although there is no 100% foolproof way, you can start by writing ‘SEE ID’ on the back of the card so merchants can cross-reference it with your ID for each transaction.”

Customer: “Oh! I can’t do that. I do a lot of transactions online and they won’t be able to see my ID.”

*long, awkward pause*

Customer: “Never mind, just pretend I didn’t just say that.”

1 Thumbs
3,609

Bulk Mail To The Future

, , , , , | Right | June 17, 2010

Caller: “Hi, I called earlier and spoke with someone about getting a quote? She was supposed to email it to me, but I haven’t seen it yet.”

Me: “Not a problem, ma’am. How long ago was she supposed to have sent it?”

Caller: “Maybe ten minutes ago?”

Me: “Let me check with her. Did you check the spam folder, just in case?”

Caller: “I’ve never opened that folder. I really don’t think it would be there anyway.”

Me: “Well, sometimes business emails will automatically go to a spam folder based on their settings. You might want to check anyway.”

Caller: “That’s ridiculous! It wouldn’t be there. Those emails are from the future!”

1 Thumbs
2,249

A Complete Avatard

, , , | Right | May 25, 2010

(This is when Avatar has just come out on DVD.)

Customer: “Do you have any copies of that new Avatar movie?”

Me: “Sorry, it looks like it’s not available anywhere right now. I could call you when a copy comes in if you like.”

Customer: “You didn’t check the backroom. Do you have any there?”

Me: “No, we don’t keep movies in the back. Company policy says we have to have all available copies on the shelf.”

Customer: “So, why don’t you have any on the shelf?”

Me: “Because we’re all checked out. There are none present at this store or any other in this area. It’s an extremely popular movie since it just came out a few days ago. We have no more copies at any nearby store.”

Customer: “Why not?”

Me: “Well, they all got checked out by other people.”

Customer: “Well, why the h*** did you let them do that? What kind of video store lets people just take whatever movie they want?!”

1 Thumbs
3,401

Pane-ful Marriage

, , , , , | Right | May 18, 2010

(A customer who has just made a purchase comes back into our store asking for help; she’s locked her keys in her car. I go out to try and help.)

Me: “Ma’am, your window is open.”

Customer: “What?”

Me: “Your window. It’s open.”

(The customer reaches in and gets her keys, opens the door, rolls up the window, locks the car, throws the keys back inside, and closes the door.)

Me: “Um…”

Customer: “I know! I know! It’s just that I already called my husband to bring the second set! He’d have given me h*** if he saw the window was open!”


This story is part of the American States roundup!

Want to read the next story? Click here!

Want to read the roundup? Click here!

1 Thumbs
6,348