(I am pregnant, and I am working still; I work in a play area for children. Sometimes parents are not the most understanding people.)

Me: *just coming back from the bathroom for the eighth time*

Customer: “My boys have been waiting for this ride; you need to stop leaving. It’s your job to man this ride.”

Me: “I’m sorry. Okay, let me check your height, sweetie.”

(I direct him towards the height requirement, and he’s a couple inches too short; I don’t count hair.)

Me: “I’m sorry, sweetie. You’re too small for this ride.”

(The child begins to argue, but the brother, who is clearly tall enough, goes on.)

Customer: “He’s not that small; just let him on.” *starts to get irritated, crossing their arms, and giving off angry body language*

Me: “I’m sorry. I can’t let him ride for safety reasons”

Customer: “It’s fine; I’m okay with it.”

(The customer then tries to usher the smaller child on the ride. I hold out my arm to stop the child.)

Me: *feels a pain, so I suck in and my eyes widen* “I’m sorry, but I cannot let him on.”

(The customer glares, then grabs the boys and storms off in a huff. The manager walks over to the ride when I get back from another pee break.)

Manager: *looks at me with a smirk* “She tried to let the kid on when you were gone, then threatened to sue us.”

Guest: “Are you security here?”

Me: “Yes, ma’am, how may I help you?”

Guest: “There’s a car blocking the street and I can’t get through to the exit.”

Me: “Ma’am… um… that’s a police car, and they can park wherever they want. All you need to d…”

Guest: “Well, if he can park there, why can’t I?”

Me: “Because you’re not a law enforcement officer on official business, ma’am. Now, to exit, you just tu…”

Guest: “How do I get to be a cop so I can park in the street?”

Me: “Contact your local police department, ma’am; they’ll give you details. Just turn left, drive to the end of the row, and turn right; takes you straight to the exit.”

(I am working at a popular amusement park. We have this one big roller coaster that has lots of big hills designed to make the rider feel weightless. After riding this roller coaster with his daughter, an elderly man comes up to me.)

Me: “Hello! How was your ride on [Roller Coaster]?”

Guest: “Horrible, actually!”

Me: “I’m sorry to hear that. What can we do better?”

Guest: “Tear down the [Roller Coaster]!”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Guest: “It needs to be torn down because it is super unsafe!”

Me: “We have licensed inspectors from the State of Missouri inspect each of our rides every month, and we inspect our rides daily.”

Guest: “You need better inspectors, then!”

Me: “And why is that?”

Guest: “Because my daughter and I almost flew out of the ride!”

(By this point, the daughter, who is about fifteen, is walking down the exit line.)

Daughter: “Come on, Dad! Let’s go.”

Guest: “Hold on! I’m talking to this little s*** over here.”

Me: “Excuse me, sir?”

Guest: “What the f*** is it?!”

Me: “I’m going to have to ask you to leave the ride.”

Guest: “No! I want to speak to your manager.”

Me: “I’ll go get him. Please wait here to the side of the loading platform of the roller coaster.”

(A conversation goes on between the man and his daughter. The other two ride operators are busy loading the next group of riders into the roller coaster. I take a notepad and a pen from the ride operator’s backpack and go back to the angry guest.)

Me: “I just called the manager.” *I really didn’t* “He wants me to write down some information for you to file a complaint.”

Guest: “I have a complaint to file, all right!”

Me: “What is your name?”

Guest: “[Guest].”

Me: “And what is it you wanted to file a complaint about?”

Guest: “The [Roller Coaster] is super dangerous and needs to be torn down.”

Me: “I can assure you that all of our rides here at [Amusement Park] are completely safe. But why do you feel that [Roller Coaster] violated our policy?”

Guest: “I almost flew out of my seat during that big hill!”

Me: “You know it is supposed to make you feel like that, right? They’re called ‘airtime hills’ and they are designed to make the rider feel weightless.”

Guest: “Wait. What?”

Me: “The [Roller Coaster] has specially designed hills, called ‘airtime hills.’ They are designed to make the rider feel like they are ‘floating’ out of their seat. Each seat is equipped with both seat belts and lap bar restraints, and we have never had a malfunction with the [Roller Coaster]’s restraint systems.”

Guest: “Oh. So… it is supposed to be like that?”

Me: “Yes. The manufacturer of [Roller Coaster] built the track layout specifically for that purpose.”

Guest: “Oh, s***. My bad. I didn’t know. I thought that it was unsafe. I don’t like that ‘floating’ feeling.”

Me: “It’s okay. It is actually a pretty common complaint us ride operators get.”

Guest: “Oh. Thanks for understanding. Can you tell us any rides that don’t have that scary ‘floating’ feeling?”

(I look around the ride platform because you can see some of the other rides from there.)

Me: “I can recommend the [Ride]. It is pretty calm and gentle in nature.”

Guest: “What does it do?”

Me: “It is a river raft ride where you float around the river in small boats.”

Guest: “Okay. And it completely safe?”

Me: “One hundred percent.”

Guest: “Okay.”

(He then walked off with his daughter. Some people are just super dumb.)

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(I work at a famous theme park in Florida. At this theme park, there are utility tunnels underneath the park where all the “unsightly” stuff happens. As I am walking through the tunnels, I see someone out of uniform. The man is wearing a Hawaiian shirt and has a camera around his neck, so I can assume he isn’t a worker here.)

Me: “Excuse me. How did you get down here without a uniform?”

Man: “What do you mean? I’m looking for [Famous Space Ride].”

Me: “Wait… You don’t work here?”

Man: “No… I’m so lost!”

Me: “But how did you get down here in the first place?”

Man: “I don’t know. This park is very confusing; I won’t be coming back.”

Me: “Okay… Sorry about that. Let me show you how to get back to level ground.”

(I told my supervisor what happened after I helped this guest, and apparently, some former cast member posted online how to get to the tunnels, and now all these guests want to try to get down, as well. There was talk about adding security at the entrances, as well, but I don’t think it ever happened.)

(I work at an outdoor park that has a lot of rides for kids, including bouncy castles, carousels, and things like that. It’s term time, so we’re quiet, and it’s been raining heavily for the last day. My manager puts me on the bouncy castles, but gives me a bag of kid’s toys to make up while I’m down there. This is quite normal practice at times when it isn’t busy. The bouncy castles have signs on each end warning customers that they’re wet when it rains. I’m keeping an eye on them, but mainly concentrating on making up the toys since we restock heavily during quiet times. A man comes up to me with his daughter, quite well-spoken and dismissive. He’s wearing a membership wristband for the park.)

Man: “You could have told me the bouncy castles were wet! I sat on one, and I’m soaked now!”

Me: “Oh, I’m very sorry, sir. It has been raining for the last day or so, and unfortunately, they don’t dry out that fast. We warn you on the signs there—“ *points* “—and there—“ *points*

Man: “Well, I didn’t see them! I need to go home and change now!”

(He leaves. Maybe if I hadn’t been making up the toys I’d have noticed him and warned him, but he was fairly warned, and he’d only really got the leg of his jeans damp. Half an hour later I’m radioed up to the office by my manager.)

Manager: “[My Name], do you have your phone with you?”

(We get fired on the spot if we have our phones on us on duty, and so lockers are provided for staff.)

Me: “No. I can show you in my locker.”

Manager: “Yes, please. I’m sure you wouldn’t, but we have to check.”

(I open the locker for my manager, and sure enough, the phone is there.)

Manager: “Oh, thank goodness. I wouldn’t have wanted to let you go. It’s just we had this gentleman come up and say you hadn’t warned him about the bouncy castles being wet because you were hunched over on your phone, not paying attention.”

Me: “No, no, I was making up those toys as you asked.”

Manager: “Don’t worry; I believe you. He demanded we give him a free change of clothes from the gift shop. We do have signs down there warning it’s wet!”

Me: “That’s what I told him!”

(I went back to work, and I am still employed at the park to this day. But the man was a member, which means he likely visits a lot and knows the staff policy on phones. So, out of embarrassment over getting a bit wet, or some kind of wounded pride over being corrected by a younger man, he tried to get me sacked. The daughter he was with didn’t seem the slight bit discomfited, but if she was a bit older she might have been embarrassed for her dad.)