Okay, But You Have To Bring It Back Again When The Sale Is Over

, , , , , | Right | December 13, 2018

(My store is closing. For the first few weeks after this is announced, all merchandise is reduced by 25%. After a period, the remaining product is reduced to 50% off. A customer comes in.)

Customer: “When did everything go 50% off? I was here last week and bought things 25% off.”

Me: “Just the other day, ma’am.”

Customer: “My stuff is still in the car. Can you do a price adjustment?”

Me: “No, ma’am.”

Customer: “What if I return it and then buy it at the new price?”

Me: “Sorry, ma’am, we aren’t accepting returns.”

Customer: “You can’t do anything for me?”

Me: “I’m afraid not.”

Customer: “Well, what good are you?” *leaves*

Unfiltered Story #131598

, , , | Unfiltered | December 5, 2018

I’m a 38 year old white guy (this becomes important later) working grave yard shift at a hotel when a couple comes in (white woman, black guy)
Customer: We’d like a room with two double beds
Me certainly that will be (quotes price)
Customer: we can get it for xx.xx online (proceeds to book room on internet after it goes through) how much is that with taxes?
Me: quotes ammount
Customer: we shouldn’t have to pay taxes.  Taxes are illegal.
Me: No they aren’t regardless you have to pay them
Customer: there are people who don’t pay taxes
Me: And they go to prison you still need to pay taxes
Customer: Read the 16th amendment (the US constitutional amendment that allows for taxation I looked it up later so in fact it proves them wrong)
Me: I don’t want to get into a political argument you have to pay the taxes
They pay for the room and leave.  Then decide they want a different room type, then have a problem with the tv in the room.  I try to fix the problem and go back to the desk to get them a new room they come down.
Customer: we want a refund
Me: Certainly one moment
Custoomer: we want a refund or an upgrade
Me: (assuming at this point they are just going to keep complaining) I’ll give you the refund hold on
I refund the money
Female customer: we’ll talk to the other guy the fat one (name)
Me: very well have a good evening
Black customer: you’re a servant
Me: very well have a good evening
Customer:look that up in the black dictionary servant means slave
Me: you are no longer a customer here please leave or I will contact the police
Customer: your a slave
Me: and your a tresspasser
Customer then walks out.  This is the point I get a chance to check the black list (customers not allowed to stay with us any more) and discover they are both on it.

Unfiltered Story #116464

, , | Unfiltered | July 13, 2018

(The store that I worked at had been closed for around five minutes. The managers hadn’t been able to lock the doors yet. I was folding towels when a man burst in with two teenage girls)

Me: Sir, I’m sorry, but we’re closed.

Man: What? Is the whole mall closed?

Me: Yes, the whole mall closed about five minutes ago.

Man: (to the girl whom I assume was his daughter) Where do you have gift cards to?

Girl: (lists a bunch of places including our store)

Man: Where’s your juniors departement?

Me: Downstairs, but we’re closed now.

Man: Come on, girls, let’s go downstairs and get something real quick. Just pick out a T-shirt or something.

Me: Sir, we’re closed!

(He walked away and took the escalator downstairs.)

Buy None Get One Free

, , , , , | Working | December 26, 2017

(It’s the final week leading up to Christmas, and I am suffering from a terrible case of what I call “Christmas brain.” I have a lot going on both at work and in my personal life, and I’m not getting enough sleep on top of chronic illness. So I’m starting to jumble things in my head a little. Fortunately, the other workers in my small store sympathize and we all have some fun with it. We are running a sale in which 100 different products are being offered at 25% off.)

Me: *to customer* “And as you shop, keep in mind that we have select items on sale for 100% off! Wait…”

(Everyone within earshot starts laughing, including me.)

Customer: “What a great deal!”

Manager: “[My Name], you’re fired.”

Me: “Okay, so really, there are a hundred things for 25% off. If you have any questions, please ask one of my coworkers. I have to go clean out my locker because I’ve just been fired.”

(I put my head on my manager’s shoulder and he gives me a friendly pat. I love my job.)

Unfiltered Story #101666

, , | Unfiltered | December 17, 2017

(I’m working the evening shift at a popular fast food chain. While our drive-thru stays open until 2am, our dining room closes at 10pm. On this one particular night, business is slow, and as the dining room is empty, my co-worker and I start sweeping and mopping. Around 9:30pm a car pulls up in front of the door and we see a older man get out.)

Man: (He walks up to the door but doesn’t open it, with his hand on the door handle,  he just stands there looking at us through the front window and gestures questioningly at the door  and mouths somthing to the effect of “Are you still open?” )

(As the hours are clearly posted on the door, I exchange a puzzled glance with my co-worker)

Me: (since the man has not even tried to open the  unlocked door,  I nod and mouth silently back to him,)  “Yes, we are still open.”

Man: (turns and waves the rest of his family out of the car)

(At this moment I get a ping on my headset indicating that someone is at the drive-thru and so I leave to take the order. As I am finishing up with serving the customer at the window, I hear a commotion in the dining room and see my manager running to the front of the store. I glance around the corner of the drive thru alcove and see the man standing in the middle of the dining room yelling at my manager.  He then see me.)

Man: (shouting and pointing his finger at me)

Me:( my mouth drops in surprise) Sir,…I would never call-


(I try to explain to him that I was just trying to let him know that we were indeed open, yet he continues to rant and yell about how terrible we are.  He reiterates how he “is not an expert at reading lips”, but is still sure that I called him an “A-hole”, and how I should be fired. His family, meanwhile, stands by the door looking mortified)

Man: (Waving his family back through the door) WE’RE LEAVING AND NEVER COMING HERE AGAIN.

(once they are gome I turn to my manager)

Me:  (mildly shaken) Look, (manager) I never called him that.

Manager: (slightly bemused) Yeah, (my name) I know.  It’s not like you to use that kind of language.  Although It’s kinda funny  that someone who “isn’t an expert at reading lips” was so dead sure of what he thought you said.

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