(I am 25 years old and am a legal guardian to my 17-year-old younger brother. We are shopping at a wholesale store for a get-together I am having with a couple of friends. I decide I want to buy some wine coolers for the get-together since all my friends are over the age of 21. I usually like doing this by myself but I am already running late and figure since I am already at the store I buy my wine coolers from, I might as well buy them then and there, completely forgetting about my younger brother’s age and the law — my bad. We are finally checking out. When they get to the wine coolers, I show my ID as per usual. This conversation happens while I’m adjusting everything in our cart.)

Cashier: *to my brother* “May I see your ID, please?”

Brother: “What for?”

Cashier: “I need to see your ID for the wine coolers.”

Brother: “They are for him, not me.”

Cashier: “Since both of you are together, I have to see your ID; otherwise, I can’t sell you this.”

(I finally get back to them and hear the last part of her sentence.)

Me: “Can’t sell us what?”

Cashier: “The wine coolers.”

(At that point, I finally remember about his age and the law.)

Me: “Oh, I completely forgot about the law. Well, he is still a minor and I am his legal guardian; since these are for me you won’t need to see his ID.”

Cashier: “Since he is a minor I can’t sell you the wine coolers; it’s against the law.”

Me: “Normally, it’s against the law, but in this case, it is different since I’m his legal guardian. If you want, we can show you our IDs to confirm that we are related and living in the same address.”

(We proceed to show her our IDs.)

Cashier: “You are indeed related and under the same address but he is still a minor and I can’t sell to someone with a minor.”

Me: “So you don’t sell to parents that come with their kids?”

Cashier: “Well, that’s different since they are parent and child and the parents are responsible for the child.”

Me: “Well, I am responsible for him, since that is what legal guardianship is, so it shouldn’t be any different.”

(This goes on for a bit until a manager overhears our conversation and comes over to see what is going on.)

Manager: “What seems to be the problem?”

Cashier: “They are wanting to buy the wine coolers while one of them is still a minor.”

Me: “Yes, he is a minor, but I am his legal guardian. We are brothers and live under the same address; we already showed her our IDs to confirm the relationship and address.”

Manager: “Did they show you their IDs with the same address?”

Cashier: “Yeah, but he is still a minor. It’s against the law.”

Manager: “Okay.” *proceeded to clear the flag on the register* “Your total will be [total].”

(I proceed to pay when I hear this.)

Cashier: “Hey, you can’t do that; it’s against the law.”

Manager: “Normally, yes, but since he stated that he is a legal guardian, he is like a stand-in parent.” *to me* “Here is your receipt.”

Me: “Thank you.”

(We started leaving while still hearing the cashier and manager “arguing” about what had happened.)

(One day, at around 10:00 pm, I am working the till at a small store. A man comes in wearing a high-vis jacket. He walks around for a while, going to the back. He opens and closes all of the beer fridges before buying some gum and then leaving. The man comes back about 45 minutes later, drunker than he was before. He staggers to the back and opens the beer fridges again. I tell my manager that I have a suspicion about what he is doing, but there are no cameras and the man has no bag to hide the booze. He buys more gum and leaves. My manager follows him around the side of the store and sees that he is drinking beer. My manager is angry that the guy has been stealing, but can’t do much as the guy has already left the store. But then, he comes back. We both watch as the man walks to the beer coolers and slips two six-packs into his high-vis jacket. My manager stops the guy before he gets to the till to buy his gum and asks him to remove the beer.)

Drunk: *slurring* “It’s not beer. It’s fat. I’m fat.”

Manager: “Sir, please remove the beer from your jacket. I know that you’ve stolen from us twice already. If you remove the beer and leave, I won’t call the police.”

Drunk: “It’s not beer! I’m fat!”

Manager: “Please–”

Drunk: “I’m fat fat fat!”

(The drunk ran for the door, and my manager just let him go with a sigh as the guy was shouting and acting crazy and he didn’t want us to get hurt.)

(I work in a small boutique wine shop in midtown. We get all sorts, especially since we’re very close to a subway hub. On this day, it’s just me and my boss working.)

Me: “Hi, how are you?”

Customer: “I’m fine. Hey, do you guys give discounts to alcoholics?”

Me: *blank stare, thinking quickly about how I should answer tactfully, coming up with nothing*

Boss: *the same*

Customer: *waiting expectantly*

Boss: “Um… No.”

Customer: “Oh, okay.”

(One of the most awkward exchanges I’ve had to date.)

(I work in a restaurant in a small town. The customers are generally nice, but occasionally, some people like to be awkward. This particular threesome of elderly ladies has already been rude when seated. My coworker goes to take their drink order; they order the house red. All is well, and their drinks are delivered. A few minutes later, they call me over and complain that the red is not the same bottle as on the menu.)

Customer: “Excuse me. I ordered the house red but I have been given something else.”

Me: *picks up menu* “Let me just check that… See here, it is the same. The menu says, ‘house red, [some region I can’t spell], France.’ And here on the back of the label, it says the same thing.”

Customer: “Yes, but the front of the label says something different.”

Me: “Yes, ma’am, that’s the brand of the wine; as it is the house bottle, we only state the region on the menu, not the brand.”

Customer: “But it’s different…”

Me: “I can assure you it is not; however, I can get you another bottle if you like.”

Customer: “No, thanks. The menu is obviously incorrect; I won’t get what I order, anyway. This one will have to do, but I want it free because it’s a screw cap!”

(I just nodded and went to tell my manager what had happened. They didn’t get their free bottle and they did the same act at the end of their meal when they then ordered the house white. I never knew so much fuss over cheap wine.)

(I recently accompanied my mother to a doctor’s appointment.)

Doctor: “Okay, now, since I’m giving you [medication], no alcohol while you’re taking it.”

Mother: “Question. By ‘no alcohol,’ do you mean ‘no alcohol at all,’ or is it okay to just have one or two drinks with dinner?”

Doctor: “Well, one drink will feel like four.”

Mother: *without missing a beat* “So, I’m just saving money?”

Me: “MAHM! STAHP!”