Unfiltered Story #116503

, , | Unfiltered | July 18, 2018

(I work in a retail store where a survey prints out after every receipt and often customers confuse this for the actual receipt when doing returns. My store also has a huge shoplifting problem so we have a strict policy on returns. No receipt means you can either do an exchange, or wait for a gift certificate to be mailed to you)

Elderly gentleman: “Hi, I’d like to return this.” *hands me a sweatshirt*

Me: “Alright y! Do you have the receipt?”

Him: “Yes, right here.” *Hands me a survey*

Me: “Oh… I’m sorry, sir, this is actually for a survey and not the real receipt.”

Him: “Well,  that’s all I got!”

Me: “Oh, well, did you happen to use a card for this purchase? We can look it up that way, too.”

Him: “It was a gift! I don’t know how they bought it!”

Me: “Well, unfortunately,  in that case I can only give you what the current selling price of it is, and you can either exchange it for something of the same value, or I can have store credit mailed to you.”

Him: “Well, how much is it?”

Me: “Let me check… looks like $7.99”

Him: “Just give me the store credit and I’ll go buy something today.”

Me: “Well,  if you want to switch it out for something else, then go hang on to this, and when you make up your mind bring your items back up, and I can swap it out for you.”

Him: “I’m not going to take it with me! Why can’t you just give me store credit?!”

Me: “I can, it’s just going to have to be mailed to you. If you want to buy something today, you’ll have to find the items you want first.”

Him: “I’M JUST GOING TO THROW IT AWAY, THEN!” *Storms out of store*

Blind Assumption

, , , , , | Right | July 10, 2018

(I have a somewhat short haircut that falls mostly to my left side, which has a tendency to cover my left eye, especially when my hands are full and I can’t fix it. I keep this particular style because my eye is a bit lazy and I like to cover it up.)

Customer: *seemingly rather annoyed and in a rude tone* “How can you stand your hair blocking your eye like that? It would drive me insane!”

Me: *taken aback by his tone* “Well… Um… I’m actually mostly blind in that eye, so I don’t really see much out of it, anyway.”

Customer: “Oh.” *obviously seeing the mistake in his assumption, quickly grabs his change and items and runs off*

The Day The Interstate Was Won

, , , , , | Right | June 15, 2018

(My wife and I are looking at jewelry in the Old Town section of Albuquerque, which is a tourist destination, and I am making small talk with the owner.)

Me: “What’s the silliest question a tourist has ever asked you?”

Owner: “Easy. ‘Is it safe to drive the interstates out here?’”

Me: “Huh?”

Owner: “That’s what I said. He said, ‘Well, because of all the Indian attacks on wagon trains.’”

Me: “I don’t have any idea what to say to that.”

Owner: “Neither did I.”

Was Going For Cinematic Dramatism

, , , , , , | Right | January 8, 2018

(I am a customer overhearing this exchange. The time is 6:45, and the movie starts at 7:00. It’s the opening weekend of a huge blockbuster, so we’re all waiting in line.)

Lady: “They say there’s a 15-minute wait! They’re going to make us stand around for fifteen minutes!”

(No one says anything.)

Lady: *louder, to the crowd* “THEY’RE GOING TO MAKE US WAIT ANOTHER FIFTEEN MINUTES! ARE WE GOING TO STAND FOR THIS, EVERYONE?!”

(No one responds. She does this four or five more times.)

Me: “IF YOU DIDN’T WANT TO WAIT FIFTEEN MINUTES, DON’T SHOW UP FIFTEEN MINUTES EARLY!”

(The lady slinked off back to her place in line, while everyone else laughed.)


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Why Not? You Blame Him For Everything Else

, , , , , | Right | October 26, 2017

(After opening an account for a customer, I realize that I am missing some information. Banking regulations require us to get the account holder’s job title, or in this customer’s situation, a previous job title, as he is retired.)

Me: *on the phone* “Sir, I’m sorry to bother you, but I’m going to need your job title from before you retired.”

Customer: “Both my wife and I worked at [National Scientific Lab].”

Me: “Yes, sir, but I will also need to get your job title, as well.”

Customer: “Is this because of Obama?!”

Me: “No, sir, these are just banking regulations. I am required to get this information.”

Customer: “Why, though?!”

Me: “That’s just what is required of me. I’m sorry if it causes any inconveniences.”

Customer: “Are you sure Obama isn’t making you do this?”

Me: “Yes, sir. As far as I know, I’ve never talked to the President about banking regulations.”

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