Serve Or Die

, , , | | Right | May 29, 2018

(I work at a REALLY busy movie theater with huge lines that go out the door because of this crazy Star Wars release. I am on register in concession next to my friend who starts coughing because of the popcorn fumes. Her coughing eventually gets so bad that I send her to the backroom to drink some water. The man she was just helping starts yelling at me 20 seconds later.)

Man: “Um, hi, excuse me! Yeah, can you just finish up this transaction here? I have somewhere to be.”

Me: “Sorry, I can’t actually touch her register; it’s policy.”

Man: *starts yelling louder, livid at this point* “So, you’re telling me that I have to miss my very expensive movie because some girl is dying?!

Me: *highly annoyed* “No, no, of course not. You can leave your line and hop on the end of mine.” *there are another 60 people in my line*

Man: *storms off without buying his food* “Un-f******-believable”

Not The Right Climate To Face Facts

, , , , , | Working | May 29, 2018

(There is still a ton of snow on the ground and cold temperatures, despite it being mid-March. My coworker and I are leaving our office for the day and she says, in all seriousness:)

Coworker: “So much for global warming.”

Me: “Well…” *looks around* “This is for sure global warming.”

Coworker: “But there’s still all this snow! And it’s so cold.”

Me: “…”

(I really didn’t feel like going through what global warming is with her… a 30-something mother of two.)

Unfiltered Story #113066

, , , | | Unfiltered | May 27, 2018

I work in a small knife store in a mall, there are usually two of us in at a time so we don’t have to close the store for half an hour, my coworker was sitting in the back room eating her lunch which means that I was out on the floor by myself, a customer comes in

Customer: *points to a $130 knife* I would like to purchase this knife

(I grab the customers knife box it up and proceed to scan it through the total brings the knife to around $140 with gst)

Customer: *in a condescending tone* $140 that’s too expensive, I would like a discount

Me: I’m sorry Ma’am I cant offer a discount on this product

Customer: Why the f**k not?

Me: Because it isn’t on sale, if you work in the culinary industry you can get 20% off of a kitchen knife, but I can’t offer discounts to people because I’m not a manager, if we offer discounts to people on sporting knives we can get written up and possibly fired.

Customer: well I work in the cullinary industry, where is my 20% ?

Me: Again, it doesnt include sporting knives, and I would need to see a student I.D. Card, a paystub, or anything else that proves you are either a cullinary student, or work in a kitchen.

(after going back and forth with this customer for about 10 minutes my coworker comes out to grab her bottle of water and goes back in to the back room to finish her lunch)

Customer: If I knew your coworker was here I would have got her to help me, she always offers me a discount whenever I come in, I’m positive that if she gives me the employee discount you can too.

(At this point I know she is lying because 1) we can not offer employee discounts, HR keeps track and we can be fired for giving a customer a discount without a reason, and 2) the managers are the only ones who can give employee discounts, a code is generated for them every day to enter into the system for a discount, so there is no way that an employee would be able to do an employee discount for a customer and 3) the only discount the associates can offer is 20% off and that’s for people who work in the culinary industry and are buying kitchen knives)

Me: (playing along with her lie) Oh, why didn’t you say so? I’ll go grab my coworker right now, since she helps you all the time I’m sure she will be more than happy to help you out again.

Customer: oh no, that’s okay I don’t want to disturb her, if she’s on her lunch

Me: It wont be a problem at all, just give me one moment.

(I put the knife behind the counter so she couldn’t steal it, as I grabbed my coworker, we walked out of the back room to see she was gone, I got a 4 day work weekend, which was disrupted by a call from my boss, the lady came in again while I was off, and she told my manager that any time she was in I gave her employee discounts, we got the lady up on the security camera and she isn’t allowed in the store any more)

How Very Provincial

, , , , | | Right | May 25, 2018

(A few months ago, I was in a car accident where I had to write off my car, and I ended up getting severe whiplash. I took a month and a half off of work to recuperate. This is my first day back at a call centre where I work taking calls for members who need roadside assistance within the province of Alberta. Everything seems to be going well until I get this call.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Company]. My name is [My Name]; how can I help you today?”

Member: “Hi, my card number is [number], and I need fuel to be delivered for my vehicle.”

Me: “Absolutely, what kind of car is it?”

Member: “Where are you located? Are you in Grande Prairie?”

Me: “I’m based in Edmonton, actually.”

Member: “So, you’re not in Edmonton, then? Are you in Grande Prairie?”

Me: “I’m based in Edmonton. The call centre is in Edmonton.”

Member: “But you’re not in Edmonton, though.”

Me: “No, I’m in Edmonton.”

Member: “I think you’re lying.”

Me: “Okay… I live in Edmonton; do you want me to name some landmarks or something? Are you familiar with the landmarks in Edmonton?”

Member: “No… but I still think you’re lying.”

Me: “Okay… Well, I just need the year, make, and model of the vehicle for the tow driver.”

Member: “It should be on file there.”

Me: “Well, we have a car on your past history, but we don’t keep cars on file since the membership follows members, not vehicles. We don’t know if you’re travelling with your friend, or if you’ve bought a new vehicle, so we always ask just to make sure.”

Member: “You guys are always reading off of scripts. Do you have a big script in front of you?”

Me: “We have prompts to remind us what we need to ask for, but we don’t have scripts. We also have a program where everything needs to be filled out or else we can’t submit the calls for the tow drivers. Can I have the year, make, and model of the car, please?”

Member: “It should be on file.”

(I go through the past history and I randomly guess it’s the same car from her last call on her history.)

Me: “Is it this 1999 LeSabre?”

(I over pronounce “LeSabre” since I was raised to read thing phonetically and it’s stuck with me my entire life, and LeSabres aren’t very common.)

Member: *corrects my pronunciation* “How can you work at [Company] and not pronounce ‘LeSabre’ properly?”

Me: “I was raised on phonics and sometimes butcher pronunciations. Okay, so, you need fuel, right? I’m assuming you need gas, not diesel, right?”

Member: “No, I need fuel.”

Me: “Gas or diesel?”

Member: “No, my car needs fuel.”

Me: “Okay, is gas okay for fuel? Do you need regular or premium?”

Member: “Premium. Normally, I use regular, but since it’s all covered under my membership, I want premium.”

Me: “No problem. We’ll be sending out [local contracted Towing Company that provides all the services our company advertises] within 60 minutes.”

Member: “I don’t need a tow truck. Don’t send those guys.”

Me: “That’s our contractor for the area. We send him out regardless of what service is being provided.”

Member: “Fine, but send him out when it gets dark.”

Me: “Okay… No problem. I can send him out later. What time should I set the appointment for?”

Member: “Never mind.” *sigh* “Just send him out now.”

Me: “Absolutely. Everything is good to go; you’ll just have to show your membership card and picture ID to the driver. Have a goo—”

Member: “Fine.” *click*

Me: “—d day?”

(I’m not sure why she was so distrusting of me, considering none of the information members give us is useful besides for getting roadside assistance. I also have no foreign accent, as I was born and raised in Edmonton, and even if the call centre was based somewhere else, even internationally, it wouldn’t have made a difference in the service being provided. Regardless, it really made going back to work just that much more frustrating.)

Have A Kindness Sandwich

, , , , , | Hopeless | May 16, 2018

(Due to a long winded tale of bad luck and worse decisions, I am unemployed, pregnant at 18 out of wedlock, and woefully unprepared for my first real winter, all in a province where I don’t know anyone except my fiancé, who, to his eternal credit, dropped everything to focus on being a husband, father, and provider when I told him the test was positive. We’re still together and he is as devoted now as he was then.  Unfortunately, at the time he’s in roughly the same boat as me, right down to having to scramble to find a coat we can afford that even partially keeps out the Edmonton weather, after growing up in balmy Victoria. As for “smalls,” we wear the hats, gloves, and scarves we find in the alleys — after washing them, obviously — since the smalls we can afford are next to useless. We always have some food, but getting a nutritious, balanced diet of the recommended calorie level is a constant balancing act. Luckily, the local grocery store is very liberal with handing out free samples. All you have to do is cruise from station to station and pretend to be interested in buying extra stuff and you can scrape up half a meal for free. So now, imagine you’re the worker at one of these stations and that’s what you see approaching: a scruffily dressed and very young couple, the girl heavily pregnant, with mismatched gloves and scant groceries in their basket, who are REALLY INTERESTED in the sandwich samples you’ve got.)

Worker: *warm smile and standard spiel*

The Mister & Me: “Sure, we’ll try some.” *scarfs down a sample each*

Worker: *casually* “So, when are you due?”

Me: “May 14.”

Worker: *correctly* “Ah, so, any day except May 14.”

The Mister & Me: *laughs*

Worker: “Your first one?”

Me: “Yup.”

Worker: “I remember my first. It’ll be a major change, but you can handle it.”

The Mister & Me: “Thanks.”

Worker: *fidgets* “Tell you what… I’m about to go off-shift. The rules say I have to throw out all my samples—”

The Mister & Me: “What? That’s so wasteful!”

Worker: “It’s to avoid them going bad.”

Mister: “Fair enough, usually, but your tray is nearly full. You must have just made those.”

Worker: *shakes head* “I still have to throw them out.”

Me: “Can’t you eat them yourself? Or share them with your coworkers?”

Worker: *shakes head* “Customers only, I’m afraid… so I was wondering if you’d mind finishing these off for me, so I don’t have to waste them.”

(Well, you don’t have to tell us twice! We stop long enough for manners, then scarf down what amounts to half a meal each at that station alone. After, beaming, we chirp:)

The Mister & Me: “Thanks!”

Worker: *smiling wistfully* “Oh, thank you. Good luck with the baby. You’ll do fine.”

The Mister & Me: “Aww, thanks.”

(We went about the rest of our shopping, such as it was… and as we headed for the registers, what did we see but the same worker, still at that station, with a fresh platter of sandwich samples? It’s been fourteen years, and I’m crying as I type this. Unlike food, kindness is never wasted.)

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