Unfiltered Story #98664

, , | Unfiltered | October 23, 2017

(This happens at my grocery store at least once a day, typically closer to 3-5 times.)

Me: Hello. Did you find anything today?

Customer: Yes.

Me: *Begins scanning items* Do you have a -official name of store’s card-

Customer: *Reading list as items scan* Those are supposed to be on sale.

Me: Yes. Do you have a membership with us?

Customer: Those are *names price.*

Me: *Takes a deep breath* Yes, do you hav-

Customer: Shush. Listen to me. The -items- are supposed to be on sale for -price-!

Me: Do you have a membership with us? The card or your phone number.

Customer: Oh. Yes. *puts in number and sales items instantly drop down to sales price.*

(Needless to say, they never apologize of even acknowledge their behavior.)

A Totally Reasonable Reaction

, , , , , | Related | October 16, 2017

(I am staying at my grandfather’s house in rural Alaska for a summer. One day, I notice several pockmarks that look like birdshot in the bedroom wall.)

Me: “Grandpa, why did you shoot the wall in my bedroom?”

Grandpa: “There was a spider.”

Me: “You used a shotgun to kill a spider?”

Grandpa: “It was a really big spider.”

Me: “Did you at least get it?”

Grandpa: *sadly* “No.”

No Cable Makes You A Cry-Baby(sitter)

, , , | Related | September 20, 2017

(A customer has a bad signal issue that we have to dispatch a technician for during a busy part of the year.)

Me: “We have an opening in two days.”

Customer: “Two days?! No cable for two days? Well, who’s gonna watch my kids?!”

You Couldn’t Service-Write This Even If You Tried

, , , | Right | September 12, 2017

(I work at an auto and diesel repair shop, and I happen to be a young female. I write estimates, talk to customers, order parts, etc…)

Me: “[Shop]. How can I help you?”

Customer: “I need a quote on my truck.”

Me: “Sure, what kind of truck?”

Customer: “Are you the service writer?”

Me: “I am.”

Customer: “Are you the only service writer? No men?”

Me: “Just me. [Old Male Coworker] left a year ago.”

Customer: “Can I talk to anyone else?”

Me: “Sure. Hang on just a minute.”

(Transfers phone to one of the owners, who is an office manager.)

Owner: “Hi, this is Jane!”

(This happens about once a month.)

Unfiltered Story #92706

, , | Unfiltered | August 29, 2017

(I work tech support and we double for the switchboard when they’re busy. This call comes in on the switchboard.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [company]. How may I direct your call?”

Caller: “I need to talk to somebody in intake?”

Me: “I’m sorry, could you repeat that?”

Caller: *yelling* “INTAKE! SOMEBODY WHO ADMITS PEOPLE?!”

Me: “I’m sorry. We don’t admit anybody here. We just provide communications services such as phone, internet and cable television.”

Caller: “You don’t provide psychiatric help?”

Me: “No, this is [company].”

Caller: “[Local mental hospital]?”

Me: “No, [company’s acronym].” *I spell out the full name*

Caller: “Oh, sorry.” *click*

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