Need To Install A Listening Station

, | Denver, CO, USA | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

(I am another customer in this case, observing. It is an extremely busy morning at the airport and there is a line of about 10 people for a coffee and pastry counter. This counter has a place to order, and a separate place to pick up and pay.)

Customer: *approaches the pay portion of the counter* “Is this where you order?”

Employee: “No, sir, you have to order down there.” *she indicates the large “ORDER HERE” sign hanging at the other end of the counter*

Customer: “I want a bagel, but I don’t want it cooked. Do you cook your bagels?”

Employee: “You can choose to have it toasted or not, if that’s what you mean. But you have to order down there.”

Customer: “Okay, well, I’ll have a plain bagel, not cooked, and a coffee.”

Employee: *at this point clearly flustered and just trying to move the guy along quickly* “Your total will be $6. Please stand off to the side and wait for that to be ready.”


Flight Plight

| Houston, TX, USA | Bad Behavior, Popular, Tourists/Travel

(A group of passengers whose flight has been delayed, causing them to miss connections, is waiting for a ticket agent to reschedule them to their destinations. Passenger #1 is a middle aged woman who has been complaining and berating the ticket agent.)

Passenger #1: “I can’t believe you can’t get me on an earlier flight! I have been traveling since ten this morning trying to get home to see my family! Do you have any idea how hard this is for me?!”

Passenger #2: *a teenage girl who up till now has been waiting quietly* “Lady, I don’t want to hear any more of your complaining. I’ve been traveling since five this morning Paris time, and I’m too tired to figure out the time difference. My luggage was lost at O’Hare, and I haven’t seen my family in a month. Now, I may be just a teenager, but even I know that this is going to go a lot faster for everyone if you just let the nice lady behind the counter do her job!”

Passenger #1: *shuts up*


Presidential Supervision Required

| Miami, FL, USA | Crazy Requests, Popular

(My supervisor is assisting me with an irate customer and now the customer wants to speak to my supervisor’s supervisor.)

Customer: “Who’s your supervisor?”

Supervisor: “Sir, I AM the supervisor. I don’t have a supervisor.”

Customer: “Who’s the president of the company?”

Me: “[President].”

Customer: *to my supervisor* “THAT’s your supervisor. Everyone has a supervisor.”

Me: *genuinely curious* “But then who’s [President]’s supervisor?”

Customer: *to me* “You’re a horse’s a**.”


Being Foggy With The Specifics

| USA | Time, Transportation

(I receive a phone call from an airline dispatcher regarding a weather forecast. Why he’s calling the air traffic control tower and not the weather service is beyond me but I think I may have solved that issue for good.)

Airline Dispatcher: “What time is the fog going to lift?”

Me: *busy and tired of dealing with the inane* “9:47.”

Airline Dispatcher: *after a short pause* “Wow, that’s pretty specific. Are you sure?”

Me: “I’d bet your life on it.”

His Drink Is Not Refreshing

, | England, UK | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

Me: “Afternoon, sir. How can I help you today?”

Customer: “Umm, yes… I’d like a drink.”

Me: “Certainly, sir, what can I get for you? Alcoholic or non?”

Customer: “Do you sell green tea with lemon in a bottle?”

Me: “Afraid we don’t, sir. I can suggest [Newsagents] just next door as they may sell it, but I’m not sure.”

Customer: “Uh, okay.”

(Ten minutes later, the same customer returns:)

Customer: “Do you sell green tea with lemon in a bottle yet?”

Me: “Sorry, sir, we still don’t carry that. I can make you a hot green tea and lemon?”

Customer: “No, thanks. I’ll keep my options open.”

Me: “Okay… Bye.”

(He came back twice more with the same request all within the hour!)

Page 2/1012345...Last