Surreally Smooth

(My friends and I are having recess when this happens.)

Friend #1: *grabbing my arm* “Oh, [My Name]! Your arm is really smooth!” *starts stroking my arm*

Friend #2: “Let me see.” *grabs my other arm* “Oh, [Friend #1], they really are smooth!”

Me: “Uh, guys, maybe you should let go of my arms…”

Friend #3: *grabs my leg* “Yeah! And her legs are really smooth, too!”

Friend #1: *starts stroking my elbow* “Oh, but her elbows aren’t smooth!”

Me: “Well—”

Friend #2: *strokes my other elbow* “Yeah, [My Name], your elbows are really rough.”

Friend #3: *stroking my elbow as well* “Yeah, you should really moisturise them.”

Me: *wriggling out of their grasp* “You guys are so weird.”

Friend #2: “Well, it’s not our fault that your skin is so smooth!

Friend #1: “Except the elbows.”

Friend #3: *nodding* “Except the elbows.”

Me: “Thank you?”