Stupidity Is A Forgon-orrhea Conclusion

| Working | June 22, 2013

(It’s the mid-1950s at a military base. My mother-in-law has taken one of her daughters, 10 years old, to the hospital because she has an infection.)

Hospital Staff: “Well, your daughter needs penicillin, but I can’t give you any.”

Mother-in-law: “What? Why not?”

Hospital Staff: “It’s in short supply. It’s under lock and key and we can only give it out under special circumstances. But, if… um… if you sign this paper, I can give it to you.”

Mother-in-law: “And what’s that?”

Hospital Staff: “It’s a form saying your daughter has a sexually transmitted disease.”

Mother-in-law: “What the [expletive]?!”

Hospital Staff: “I’m sorry, but that’s they only way I can let you have some.”

(My mother-in-law storms out of the hospital and directly to the base commander’s office. She barges her way into the office and explains, in no polite terms, the indignities of being asked to sign official medical records attesting that a 10 year old has syphilis. She got the medication without signing.)

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