Stripped The Request Down To The Basics

(During the Winter World Championships, I work at a hotel as a night porter. Because of the championships, quite a few guests come to the hotel drunk as they’ve been partying. It’s about 1:15 am, and two drunk guests in a company arrive. I open the door for them.)

Guest #1: “Hey, do you know where [Manager] is?”

Me: “Uh, she’s sleeping.”

Guest #1: “Where is she sleeping?”

Me: “In a bed?”

Guest #1: “No, in what room is she sleeping?”

Me: “Um, she’s not working now. I’m having the night shift right now. Do you want the key to your room?”

(They do, and I give them the key.)

Guest #1: “And can you send [Manager] up to our room?”

Me: “Why? Is there something wrong? Has something happened?”

Guest #1: “No, we just—”

Guest #2: “Hey, do you live here?”

Me: “No, I live in [Neighbouring Town].”

Guest #2: “Where in [Neighbouring Town] do you live? Do you know of any strip clubs over there or here in town?”

(I look at him for a moment, not sure if he’s joking or not.)

Me: “Uh, I don’t visit them, so I wouldn’t know.”

Guest #2: “Can you look it up for us?”

Me: “Uh—”

Guests #2: “Oh, and I’d like to buy a bag of [Cheese Snacks].”

(I ring him up, and the transaction goes smoothly.)

Guest #1: “Oh, and if you meet [Manager], can you ask her if she knows of any strip clubs around here?”

Me: “I don’t think she’ll know much more about those than I do. But I guess I can ask her…”

Guest #1: “See that you do.”

(Both guests left for their room, leaving me to debate if I should, in fact, look up any nearby strip clubs, and if that was why they wanted to speak to my boss.)