Stop… Giving… Them… Options!

, , , | Right | September 4, 2020

I serve in an Italian restaurant with a very large menu. As a result, guests are sometimes a bit too ambiguous in order-taking and I have to specify which of the similarly-named foods or beverages they would like. Usually, the other guests at the table will take the hint and order more specifically, but not in the case of this party of four.

Guest #1: “I’ll have the bruschetta.”

There are four varieties of bruschetta.

Me: “Certainly, which one would you prefer?”

Guest #1: “The [most popular].”

Guest #2: “And I’ll have the salmon.”

There are five different salmon dishes.

Me: “Sure, which salmon dish would you like?”

Guest #2: “What? You know, the [one of the salmon entrees].” 

Me: “No problem, and for you?”

Guest #3: “I want the steak.”

Trying not to show exasperation.

Me: “Of course, would you like—”

I list seven different steak dishes, all with different cuts, sizes, and sides. [Guest #3] looks at me like I have three heads.

Guest #3: “The [filet mignon dish]. And a glass of Pinot.”

Me: “Sure, Pinot Noir or Pinot Grigio? And how would you like your steak cooked?”

Guest #3: “The red one. And pink.”

Me: “So a healthy medium. And for you?”

Guest #4: “I’ll have the salad.”

I almost lost my cool at this point, as there are almost fifteen types of salad that I had to walk her through.

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