Sticking To One’s Guns

(A squadmate and I from my unit are out at the range, practicing with a pair of higher-priced military style AR rifles. Both of us are wearing civilian clothes and military issue armor and ammo carriers, for practice. A guy in the next lane over has a similarly expensive gun, and the far lane is occupied by an obvious civilian with a much cheaper, wooden rifle.)

Next Lane: “Look at that s***! Only f****ts use Mosins. It’s a gay rifle!”

Me: “Oh, that’s not true…” *I look at my buddy* “Do you have a Mosin, darling?”

My Buddy: *doesn’t miss a beat* “Of course not, baby.”

(He stops reloading the mag he has and stands very close to me with one arm around my shoulders.)

Next Lane: *packs up and leaves immediately*

(I am not gay, but my squad mate is!)