Spoon-Fed Corn-Fed

(I work at a fast food restaurant where customers walk through a line and select ingredients for their meals. Business is extremely fast-paced, and employees are expected to push customers through quickly, while making the options as clear as possible. Every time I list an option, I make sure to point to it, so the customer knows what I’m asking them about quickly.)

Me: “Next up we have our salsas. Would you like mild, medium, or hot?”

(Our mild salsa has chunky tomatoes and is often mistaken for pico de gallo. I don’t bother clarifying the distinction unless I can’t figure out what the customer actually wants.)

Customer: “No salsa.”

Me: “All right, would you like some corn, or some sour cream?”

Customer: “Give me some of that pico.”

(I scoop on some mild salsa.)

Me: “Sure. Did you want some corn or sour cream? Maybe some cheese?”

Customer: “I want some mild, too.”

Me: “Just to be sure, you want this one? The medium one?”

(I point to the medium salsa, which is green. The hot salsa is red.)

Customer: “No, no, the red one.”

Me: “That one’s the spiciest one, is that okay?”

Customer: “Okay.”

Me: “Sure. How about some corn or some sour cream?”

Customer: “No. I want some of the medium sauce.”

Me: “All right, how about some corn, or sour cream?”

Customer: “No. Cheese.”

Me: “Sure, how about some guacamole or lettuce?”

Customer: “I want some of that sour cream.”

Me: “Anything else for you today?”

Customer: “Can I have some corn stuff?”

(The customer has now declined five different things when I offered them, and then asked for each one themselves afterwards, making it take at least twice as long to get them through the line. I have this conversation multiple times a day.)