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Something Tells Me She Never Would Have Been Happy

, , , , | Right | October 19, 2018

(A woman enters my store with a jug of stain and odor remover and a sour expression on her face.)

Customer: “My husband bought this, and I hate this brand. What else do you have?”

Me: “We have a couple of cleaners made by [Other Brand] but mostly we just carry the [Brand she already has] line.”

Customer: “You don’t have [list of several other brands]?”

Me: “No, just [Brands].”

Customer: “Well, I am very unhappy!”

Me: *still smiling even though I couldn’t care less if she’s happy or not* “If you’d like to return this, I can help you with that. Do you have your receipt?”

Customer: “No, my husband bought it! You can refund it or give me cash.”

(I check with my manager who is nearby and he comes over.)

Manager: “Unfortunately, since you don’t have a receipt, we can only do an exchange or give you a store credit.”

Customer: “But it has your store’s price sticker on it!”

(And for all we know, lady, you stole it from this store or our other location, and now you’re trying to return it for money you aren’t owed. Of course, neither of us says this out loud.)

Manager: “And we’d be happy to issue a store credit or do an exchange for you.”

(The customer grumbles, but looks around and finds other items to purchase. When she returns to the register, I’m assisting another customer who is filling out a form for our loyalty club, a process that takes a maximum of two minutes. Of course, the first customer rolls her eyes, sighs loudly, and taps her foot throughout the entire brief process. Once it’s her turn, I process the exchange as cheerfully as possible.)

Me: “Your total with the exchange is [amount]. Would you like to sign up for our free loyalty club today?”

Customer: “No! I won’t be shopping here.”

Manager: *still cheerful and smiling* “Thank you, ma’am. Have a good day!”

(Once she’s gone, he turns to me and says exactly what I’ve been thinking the whole time.)

Manager: “I would have made an exception and given her the refund if she hadn’t been such a b**** about it.”


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