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Someone Seriously Needs A Time-Out

, , , | Right | August 8, 2008

(I was in line at a Texas-style BBQ restaurant that serves you counter-style. A Wall Street-type dressed in a very expensive designer business suit is two people ahead of me.)

Counter Guy: “What can I get you?”

Customer: “I need two pounds of moist brisket, wrapped up to go.”

Counter Guy: “Sorry, we just ran out.”

Customer: *slams fist on counter* “AAGGHH, F***! What the f***?!”

Counter Guy: “Um… I’m sorry sir. We still have plenty of the lean brisket.”

Customer: “I don’t want the f***ing lean brisket. I came all the way here for the moist. I can’t f***ing believe this s***! What the f***?”

Counter Guy: “Sir…”

Customer: “Ahh, s***! I can’t believe I came all the way the f*** up here for this s***. Of course you’re out! Why wouldn’t you f***ing have the moist? Ahh!”

Counter Guy: “Sir, really, we have the lean and it’s still very good.”

Customer: “But I don’t want the lean. I came for the moist. S***! This f***ing sucks!”

Counter Guy: “C’mon, sir, just try the lean. I’m sure you’ll like it.”

Customer: “No, I won’t! I want the moist. How the f*** can you be out? F***!”

Counter Guy: *offers a free sample of lean brisket* “I’ll give you some to try. Please, sir, just try it.”

Customer: “Fine! I’ll try the d*** lean!”

(He takes a bite.)

Customer: *completely calm* “Yeah. Yeah, that’s not bad at all. I’ll take two pounds to go, please.”


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