Some Brains Are Less Absorbent Than Others

(This happened during one of our new hire’s first shifts. We are beginning to see that it isn’t going to work out.)

Coworker: *shouting from the back of the store* “Uh, we have a problem!”

Me: “What happened?!”

Coworker: “I spilled the mop bucket all over the floor.”

Me: “Oh, that’s not a big deal. I thought you hurt yourself or something.”

Coworker: “How do I clean it up?”

Me: “…With the mop?”

Coworker: “Oh, okay!”

(Fifteen minutes later, I go investigate why my coworker hasn’t reappeared and find water still all over the floor.)

Me: “I thought you cleaned this up.”

Coworker: “The mop stopped soaking up the water, so I used a whole roll of paper towels!”

Me: *facepalm*