Software Scammer Gets The Ol’ Uncle Sammer
I’m relaxing at home watching TV with my parents. I look at my phone and notice a direct message on a popular instant messaging software. Normally, I’d ignore it, but it’s from one of my friends.
Friend: “Hey, [My Name]! I have a problem. Are you free for a bit?”
Sensing the urgency, I exchange a brief back-and-forth over the software with him.
Me: “What’s happened?”
Friend: “So… you’re not going to like hearing this, but I accidentally reported you and got your [Gaming Software] account banned. You need to contact customer support and resolve this.”
Me: “Really?”
Friend: “Yes. I’m so sorry about this!”
He gives me some contact information, but I’m immediately suspicious because it’s not from [Gaming Software]’s official account. I also check my friend’s profile photo and realize that everything is the same except for the username. I immediately call my friend.
Me: “Hey, [Friend]. I’m sorry to bother you, but did you by any chance report me on [Gaming Software]?”
Friend: *Concerned* “No, I didn’t. I’ve been on vacation, so I didn’t bring my gaming equipment with me.”
Me: “I thought so. Listen, when you get back home, I’d check and see if your [Messaging Software] account was compromised in any way. It’s a long story. I’ll tell you later after I’ve resolved some stuff on my end.”
Friend: “I see… Thanks for letting me know.”
The “customer support” person calls me on the software. Having nothing better to do and knowing the person is a scammer, I decide to string them along and mess with them.
Scammer: “Hello, [My Name]. How are you doing today?”
Me: “I’m doing good. I understand there’s a problem with my [Gaming Software] account?”
Scammer: “Yes, there is. Your account was compromised, and I’m here to help you get it back.”
Me: *Unconvinced* “I see. What do I need to do?”
The scammer proceeds to tell me to go to some sketchy website and buy a whole bunch of stuff with my card.
Me: “I have a quick question for you. Are you really customer support?”
Scammer: “What are you talking about? Of course I am. Your account has been compromised, and I’m here to help you.”
Me: “I ask because I’ve dealt with customer service before, and normally, they ask me to verify some details like my email and/or the value of my account.”
Scammer: *Nervously* “It’s… It’s a new policy, sir. We ask you to make these purchases so we can verify that the card on file is correct.”
At this point, I decide to pull a “racist American” act on the scammer.
Me: “Sir… you appear to have an accent. Tell me, are you really an American?”
The scammer seems offended, and his foreign accent becomes clearer.
Scammer: “You dare question my nationality?! I’m American! I was born here, and I’ve lived here my entire life.”
Me: “Are you sure? Because I really hate foreigners… and you sound like one.”
Scammer: “Sir, I won’t tolerate these claims from you! I can assure you I’m an American!”
Me: “If you’re really a proud, god-fearing American, name every state capital in alphabetical order.”
Scammer: “…”
The scammer let out a scream, and the call dropped. I proceeded to call the actual customer service line, and they told me my account had been hacked and asked me to verify some details. I also reported the scammer to them, and the person let out an exasperated sigh.
A few days later, I received an email to reset my password on my account. Everything was still there, but I had to clear out some things left by the scammers. My friend’s account wasn’t compromised, but he changed his profile picture and password as a precaution.






