So Cute I Could Just Eat You

(I usually ask my boyfriend absurd questions, and he usually answers without giving them much thought.)

Me: “If you were a polar bear and I was a penguin, would you be able to resist eating me?”

Boyfriend: “Yes, I would protect you.”

Me: “What happens when all your other bear friends want to eat me?”

Boyfriend: “I would protect you from them. I am bigger and stronger than all of them. If worst came to worst and there were too many and you could not get away, I would swallow you whole and fight them to my death. You could crawl out when it was safe.”