Sleeping Through Parenting

(My sister has just fallen out of her bed and is crying. My mom wakes and shakes my dad.)

Mom: “Honey, get up. Your daughter is injured.”

Dad: *sleepily* “Why is she my daughter at times like this?! You go!”

Mom: “I did the birthing. You do the check-ups. Now, go! She may be badly hurt.”

Dad: *grumpily* “Fine!”

(Dad gets up and trudges to the door, still asleep. But he goes in the walk in closet, and gets stuck there. Meanwhile, my sister is still crying.)

Dad: *pawing through clothes* “Honey! Help! I can’t get out! Is this the hallway? Where am I?”

Mom: “You’re in the closet! Oh, God!”

(Mom finally gets up and takes care of my sister. After, she finds my dad asleep on the closet floor. The next morning he has no memory of what happened!)