Sick Of Their Complaints

(I work in a Chinese restaurant in a small town, and a couple come in whilst we have a few people eating in. I have seen them in here a few times, and they are known around the town for being alcoholics. The woman is constantly complaining and trying to take things (such as magazines in the waiting area). On this particular night they are complaining about their food last night.)

Husband: “We want a full refund. Your food last night made us sick. I went to the toilet three times and vomited straight after eating it.”

Me: “Sir, if it was food poisoning you wouldn’t have felt it until later, not right away.”

Husband: “It was food poisoning and I know it. I know what it was. We come here all the time and we never complain, but I’m sick of it now. We’re going to tell the whole town about this and we’re never coming back.”

Me: “With all due respect sir, your wife complains almost every time you get food from here.”

Husband: “Yeah, but she’s a b****. I’m the one complaining now!”