Show Crime

(I’ve sold a ticket to a man for a 5:00 pm show time. A few minutes later, I see him out of the corner of my eye entering the theater. It’s not even 1:00 pm yet. There’s an earlier showing of the movie already playing, plus a 2:30 pm showing before the one he bought his ticket for. I call a manager who goes into the theater and comes out with the man. I hear the following exchange.)

Manager: “I understand you bought a ticket to the five o’clock show time. If you’d like to see the rest of the current show time, I’ll have to ask you to exchange your ticket for it or buy a ticket to get in.”

Customer: “But this one is already playing!”

Manager: “I understand, sir.”

Customer: “Why can’t I just go see this one?”

Manager: “Because you didn’t buy a ticket to this show time.”

Customer: “But I bought a ticket to the five o’clock show time! So I should be able to watch the end of this.”

Manager: “That’s not how that works, sir.”

Customer: “Why not?”

Manager: “Sir, you bought a ticket for a specific show time. You need to go to that show time.”

Customer: *acting like he’s the smartest guy in the world* “But I just figured I’d watch the end of this one, and then I could also see the two-thirty show time and the five o’clock show time!”

Manager: *taken aback* “Sir, you essentially just told me you’re paying for one show time, but seeing three movies.”

Customer: *proud* “Yup!”

Manager: “Sir, that’s basically stealing.”

Customer: “How so?”

Manager: “You’re viewing two shows without paying for them!”

Customer: “But how is it stealing? I’m not taking them home.”

Manager: “You’re using a paid service without paying for it.”

Customer: “But it can’t be stealing if I’m not taking the movie home!”

Manager: “Seriously? You’re acquiring and using a service without paying for it. What else would you call it besides stealing of services?”

Customer: *beaming* “Being a smart customer who knows his rights!”

Manager: “Speaking of rights, you know I have the right to kick you out, right?”

Customer: *suddenly bolting towards the exit door* “I’ll be back at five!”