She’s Singing The Wrong Tune

(I work the front desk at a hotel. One guest wants to leave early, but is not happy that she will be responsible for the rest of her stay. She has been making random complaints all night, no doubt to try and get a refund for her “awful” stay. This is my favorite complaint from her.)

Me: “Front desk.”

Guest: “The music at the outdoor bar is too loud. No one’s out there anyway, so tell them to turn it off.”

Me: “I will certainly ask them to turn it down for you.

Guest: *getting angry* “You mean to say you can’t TELL them? You have to ASK?”

Me: “Ma’am, I don’t have the authority to TELL anyone to do anything. Besides, we are not affiliated with that bar. The best I can do is ask them to turn their music down a bit.”

Guest: *laughs at me condescendingly, and spits a few insults before hanging up*

(The best part? The bar wasn’t playing any music.)