She Will Not Be Joining Him On The Naughty List

I am at my company’s Christmas party, not a hugely fancy event but fairly nice all told, just for employees and their partners. One man from a different department brought his wife — a total knockout and very classy — and they seem really happy together.

Another guy in a different department — also married but he didn’t bring his wife — keeps joining any conversation his colleague’s wife is in. Over the course of the evening, this turns into him trying to get her attention and engage her on his own. It’s pretty subtle, so most people don’t notice, and the colleague’s wife is perfectly polite to him and treats him the same as everyone else.

Eventually, she goes to get a drink on her own, near where I am. The jerk follows her, acting all suave, and tries to lean in and say something to her quietly. I can see her patience finally snap, and she looks down her nose at him like a queen rendering judgment as she speaks loud enough for a few of us nearby to hear.

Colleague’s Wife: “Only one man in the world is allowed in my bed, and you are not him!”

She stormed away to her husband, who was on the other side of the room and didn’t hear, and just held his hand and stayed with the group he was talking with. From the looks that the rest of us give the jerk, he got a big lump of coal and a lot of drama for Christmas. I just feel bad for his wife.

As for me, I’m now determined not to get married until I find a man who makes me want to guard his place in my bed like a lioness guarding her territory!