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She Sure Wasn’t Banking On That Coincidence

, , , , , | Working | July 20, 2020

I work at a bank. We get mystery shopped several times a year. We have a very long list of things we get graded on. One of them is if we do a full financial profile. If done correctly, these take about twenty minutes.

I get a mystery shopper. I do a full financial profile, recommend a few products, answer her questions, and then she leaves. Even though I hit all the required categories, she does not score me well, and I get a very long lecture because of it.

A year later, I’ve transferred fo a different branch. One of the tellers informs me there’s a lady in the lobby looking for “information on our accounts,” which is our code for “mystery shopper.” She looks vaguely familiar. I invite her to have a seat at my desk and tell her about the financial profile.

Shopper: “Oh, you can absolutely do that! I’ve got time.”

Me: “Great! I’m going to start by asking for some personal information.”

I enter her information and get a pop-up that warns me of a duplicate profile. I click on it and discover it’s my shopper from the year before. All the information matches, right down to the email address. Since I know she’s a picky scorer, and I’m not likely to do well with her, I decide to have a little fun with this.

Me: “Ma’am, I have to say that you look so familiar! Have you banked with us before? Or maybe visited one of our other branches?”

Shopper: “No, not at all! I’m new to the area.”

Me: “Oh, well, you must have a twin! A mystery shopper who looked just like you came to [My Old Branch] last year!”

She stares at me for a second. A look of recognition crosses her face. I smile.

Me: “But I’m sure that’s a coincidence. Now, let’s start your financial profile. Tell me how you like to bank…”

I did a full profile and recommended five to seven products, making sure to describe them all in great detail. The whole thing took over an hour.

About a week later, I got a phone call from our regional manager, congratulating me on a near-perfect score and some glowing comments about how “friendly and engaging” I was. If you’re going to mystery shop, at least make up some new information.

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