She So Didn’t Ace This One

I’m a cis female. I go with some friends of mine to an LGBT bar to celebrate my friend’s birthday, and we’re all dressed up for it. The bar is also a popular place for LGBT people to hook up. I’m at the bar to order a drink when another woman approaches me.

Woman: “Hey, listen, you’re really cute. I know you’re here with a group of people, but do you want to hang out with me, instead? See where the night goes?”

Me: “Thanks, but I’m not interested.”

The woman very quickly gets put out.

Woman: “Wait, are you straight?! Because these bars are supposed to be a safe place for gay people.”

Me: “One, I’m not making it any less safe. Two, I’m not straight.”

Woman: “You’re not straight?”

Me: “No.”

Woman: “But you’re not a lesbian?”

Me: “Bit of a jump from ‘not interested’ to ‘not a lesbian,’ but no. And I’m not bi, either, before you guess.”

The woman is looking very confused by this point, but the bartender who is returning with my drink nods to my wallet: a flag made of black, grey, white, and purple stripes.

Bartender: “She’s ace, love.”

Me: “Aromantic, as well. Shoot for the moon if you want, honey, but you’re going to be lucky if you make it to Wollongong.”

But seriously, who sees that someone who is clearly there with a group of friends and celebrating, and decides, “Surely this individual will want to hook up!”?