She Likes Piña Coladas, And Getting Sugar To The Brain

(I recently started bartending and learning to mix cocktails. One night a customer was unhappy with her piña colada.)

Customer: “This tastes horrible!”

Me: “I’m very sorry about that. Would it be okay if I tried the drink, to figure out what I messed up?”

(I try the drink and it tastes normal.)

Me: “Sorry, but I can’t taste the problem. I could try and make you another one, but it’ll probably taste the same. Maybe another cocktail?”

Customer: “No, I want a piña colada. What have you been putting into this?”

Me: “The usual. Ice, coconut syrup, cream, white rum, pineapple juice—”

Customer: “Why in the world would you put white rum in that?”

Me: “Because that’s the recipe? At least the one we are using here.”

Customer: “No, there’s no white rum in a piña colada. There’s piña colada in piña colada!”

(At that point I realise she’s probably used to store-bought pre-mixed drinks. I tell her that my boss will sort it out, and after talking to him, we make a drink with half the alcohol and double the syrup. Apparently that hit the spot.)