She Got Sick Of Him

Manager: “We had a guy vomiting in the lounge. He’s headed to you and asking for a refund.”

(Dude stumbles up, clearly drunk.)

Dude: “I got sick and they’re making me leave.”

Me: “Have you been drinking?”

Dude: “Yeah, of course.” *our event does not serve alcohol*

Me: “Then I can’t give you a refund.”

Dude: “Why?”

Me: “Because you came into our event drunk and puked all over our lounge.”

Dude: “Yeah, but I want to see the show.”

Me: “Well, you came in here drunk and laid a pile of puke inside.”

Dude: “I’ll just wait ten minutes, and then I’ll feel better.”

Me: “I still can’t put you in the show.”

Dude: “Why not?”

Me: “Because you are a liability. You may knock someone over, break something, or throw up again.”

Dude: “Ah, yeah, okay. I’ll come back in ten minutes.”

(The dude and his girlfriend go outside. A few minutes later the dude’s girl comes back.)

Dude’s Girl: “Can I still go to the show?”

(We let her in, and she walked out holding ANOTHER guy’s hand and cuddled out front with him for about an hour.)