She Flopped And Then She Flipped

I am in a houseware merchandise store, having a pleasant conversation with the cashier, when a woman comes charging up to the register. She speaks loudly over me and demands to know where the flip-flops are. 

Cashier: *Looking a little confused* “We… don’t sell flip-flops here.”

Customer: “Yes, you do! You have banners saying they’re on sale! If you’re going to be useless, then get someone who knows what the h*** they’re doing!”

The cashier calls for a manager and finishes up my sale, but I don’t leave yet. You see, there IS a clothing and accessories retailing company next door. The store is announcing, with big banners, that they are having an end-of-season sale for $1 for a pair of flip-flops. But both of the stores are huge, so she didn’t just miss the door by a few feet to the side; she missed the store by basically half the parking lot.

And I admit, my mean streak rears its head as I realize I get to tell this rude woman what an idiot she is.

The woman is fuming, all red in the face, waiting for the manager. I walk up to her and look her in the eye.

Me: “Lady, if you are looking for flip-flops, the store next door has them for a dollar.”

A light in her brain seems to go on, and she finally looks around. 

Me: “Yeah, you just threw a fit in the wrong store.”

The woman spins around to the cashier and snaps.

Customer: “You should have told me that!”

Me: “Yeah, because it’s the cashier’s fault that you messed up. Better hurry, or they’ll be gone!”

The woman glowers at me, but the siren call of cheap summer shoes is too strong to resist, and she practically sprints out. Once she’s out of earshot, I give the cashier an evil grin.

Me: “You know, if I cared enough, I could follow her just to see her face when she finds out that they sold out of the dollar flip flops over an hour ago.”

Then, I patted the logo-bearing bag containing the last of the flip-flops that I had bought earlier.