Scripted Unencrypted

| Working | January 20, 2014

(The night before, I had received a very scary obscene phone call from someone who proved he knew my name and address, and then made a bunch of very graphic threats of sexual assault. I’d already called the police, who advised me to try to have the phone company trace the call. Unfortunately, I can’t find any kind of customer relations number. I have to call the main customer service number, which has an automated voicemail that won’t let me progress unless I choose from a list about what the call is about. I pick ‘sales’ because I don’t know what else to do and figure it’d be answered fastest.)

Service Rep: “Thank you for calling [Company]. How can I help you?”

Me: “Yeah, listen. This actually isn’t a sales call, I just couldn’t find any other number and was hoping you could transfer me. I needed to speak with someone about tracing a call for the police.”

Service Rep: “Um… So, this isn’t…?”

Me: “No. Listen, I know you have a script you need to follow, but this is different. I had this really scary phone call from a guy who made threats. The police told me to call you and have you trace the number. But I couldn’t find a number for that department, only the main number, so I need you to just transfer me. Please don’t bother with the sales stuff, just transfer me to the right department.”

Service Rep: “Wow, I’m sorry to hear that. So, you need me to—”

Me: “I need you to transfer me to the department that handles phone traces. I have the case number from the police department and everything, I just need to talk to the right person. You don’t need to take the number or anything. I’m just kind of shaken up and wanna take care of this. Please, just transfer the call.”

Service Rep: “Okay, I can transfer you. But I don’t get it. You called the sales office.”

Me: “Yes. That’s because I couldn’t find the right number and the main number was all I could dial. I didn’t know what else do to. Please, just transfer me.”

Service Rep: “Okay… but before I do, can I tell you about our new long distance package?”

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