Scan-dalous
(I’m working a cash register at a supermarket.)
Me: “G’day, how’s it going?”
Customer: “Yeah, pretty good, thanks.”
(I begin to scan her items.)
Me: “So do you have any plans for the rest of your day?”
Customer: “Yeah, I hope to get laid for the first time in three years!”
(I look over to see she had amongst her groceries: several punnets of strawberries, dipping chocolate, oysters, condoms, and personal lubricant.)
Customer: *beaming*
(I return to scanning her items in silence. She pays and gathers her items.)
Me: “Have a great night.”
Customer: “Oh, believe me, I will!”