Scam Me Once…

(This begins when “Pokemon Go” has just become a thing.)

Wife: “I really hope you like your Christmas present this year.”

(Christmas arrives, but the present doesn’t.)

Wife: “This is so annoying! They said it would be here by now!”

(January 15 arrives and it’s still not here.)

Wife: “I can’t believe this! Why isn’t it here yet?!”

Me: “Let me look into it. Show me where you ordered it.”

(She had gone through Amazon to get me a “Pokemon Go Plus.” After checking over the reviews…)

Me: “It was a scam.”

Wife: “WHAT?!”

Me: “Yep, look at all these comments. Let’s put in for a refund.”

(Two years later, I am at an appointment speaking with someone when my phone keeps vibrating incessantly, alternating between my wife and a mystery number.)

Me: *sighs* “I’m sorry, but this keeps happening. Do you mind if I get this?”

Appointment Man: “No problem.”

Me: *answers for wife* “What?!”

Wife: “There’s another number that should be calling you! You have to pick up!”

Me: “Okay…” *does so next call*

Man: “[My Name]?”

Me: “Yes?”

Man: “Hey, I’m calling to congratulate you! You and your wife have won a trip to the Wizarding World of Harry Potter!”

Me: “Oh, really?”

(Admittedly, you’re reading this and thinking, “Come on, don’t fall for it,” but we recently had, in fact, put our names into a contest for this at a comic-con*

Man: “Yes! It couldn’t have happened to a nicer pair of teachers. Now, all we need is a card number to put down a deposit.”

(My wife is patched in now, as well, on a three-way call, and she is gushing over her excitement. Alarm bells are going off in my head, but admittedly, I need to get back to my appointment and can’t deal with this.)

Wife: “This is so exciting! We really needed this!”

Me: “Is my part done here? I kind of have to get back to what I’m doing here…”

Man: “Yes, no problem. Congratulations, again!”

(I finish up with my appointment and then head home, starting to look into the company from the invoice that was very quickly sent. My heart quickly sinks as I can’t find a BBB rating for them, the site has only had a domain for 160 days despite them claiming to have been a travel company for ten years, etc. I explain it to my very disappointed wife who doesn’t want to believe that we’ve been scammed, yet again, but I point out the facts and she grudgingly accepts it. Turns out, though, she gave them our debit card number and I learn the hard way that it is much harder to get a payment reversed on a debit card than a credit card. We spend the next month and a half sweating over possibly losing $400, but in the end, we get it back. One year later…)

Wife: “I really hope your anniversary present gets here in time. They said it should be here by now.”

Me: “I’m sure it’ll be fine.”

(The anniversary arrives and, lo and behold, nothing.)

Wife: “I can’t believe this! You want to look into it?”

Me: “Sure… Where’s it coming from?”

Wife: *gives me the site* “I even emailed them and they didn’t email me back!”

Me: *thinking* “Not again…” *looks into site* “Third time’s the charm, honey.”

Wife: “What?”

Me: “Scam.”

Wife: “OH, COME ON!”

(Yes, we did get the money back on that one, too. At least this time it was on a credit card.)