Say Bye Bi To This Coworker

, , , , , , | Working | May 25, 2018

(I am a male. I work in a smallish admin team for a large engineering company. I am also bi, and while I don’t make an issue of it, I don’t hide it when referring to the gender of the person I am seeing. None of my colleagues have ever had an issue with this. until one day when I happen to mention that I am going on a date with a female friend of mine.)

Coworker: “I thought you were gay?”

Me: “No, bi.”

Coworker: “But you used to date [Male Ex]; you brought him to the Christmas party.”

Me: “Yeah, I did, but I am bi, not gay. [Male Ex] and I broke up a few months back, and I thought it was time to get back to dating again.”

Coworker: *confused stare* “So, you are still gay, but you are dating a girl, as well; is she one of those [slur]s?”

Me: *really?!* “No, she isn’t transgender; she is a woman.” *not going to attempt to explain trans/cisgender at this point* “I am bi; I date men and women. I find them both attractive.”

Coworker: *seems to be mulling this over* “Are your parents pressuring you? I think it’s wrong that some people are homophobic. Is that why you are ‘dating’ this girl?”

Me: “No… I am dating her because I find her attractive and I’ve known her for years.”

Coworker: “And she doesn’t mind that you are gay?”

Me: “Some people are gay, some people are straight, and other people are bi. I am bi. I like men and women. Oh, look! My lunch time is over.” *dashes from staff room*

(Apparently the idea is too much to understand, as she continues to refer to me as gay.)

Coworker: “Do you watch that Ru Paul’s Drag Race?”

Me: “No, I don’t really like drag.”

Coworker: ” I thought all gays liked drag?”


Coworker: “Gays have such good style. [My Name], will you take me shopping?”


Coworker: “Are you on that Grinderer thing? Someone said all the gays use it.”

Me: “Again, I am not gay, and I don’t think my girlfriend would like me using it.”

(At my last work’s night out, I had to explain to my girlfriend why one of my coworkers might try and check her for a penis.)

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