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Santa Is Red

| Related | December 23, 2013

(It’s Christmas, and a left-wing leisure organization hosts an event in the local theatre. The children go on stage with a Santa Claus impersonator, who gives them small presents. The kids are encouraged to tell rhymes or sing songs. I’m three years old.)

Me: “I want to go onstage!”

Mother: “What on earth for? You’re too young!”

Me: “I want to go! I want a present too!”

Mother: “But you don’t even know a rhyme!”

Me: “I know a song! I want to go!”

Father: “Let her go. Let’s see what she does.”

(I join the queue with the other kids, and finally it’s my turn to be onstage with Santa.)

Santa Impersonator: “Well, well, here’s a very young lady. What’s your name?”

Me: “I’m [name], and I want to sing a song.”

Santa Impersonator: *handing the microphone to me* “All right. What are you going to sing?”

Me: “I’m going to sing The Red Flag!”

(I start singing the theme song to socialism. Part of the audience stands up and sings with me, part is scandalized, and the rest are rolling with laughter. My parents had not been aware that their neighbour, a former partisan, had taught me the song!)