This Sale Is No Reward

(This happened on a very busy day around Christmas, with the lines winding from the front down several aisles. Mostly people have been waiting in line patiently, when a woman comes barreling through the line and sets her items at my counter.)

Me: “Hello, ma’am, I’ll be happy to help you but these other customers have been waiting longer.”

Woman: *who I now notice reeks of urine* “THERE IS NO LINE! IT’S MY TURN!”

Next Customer: “Just let her go through. We can wait.”

Me: “Okay, do you have a rewards card with us?”

Woman: “A what? What are you asking me?”

(I hold up a card to show her what it looks like, and she nods and starts rummaging through her purse as I bag her two items and wait as patiently as I can while eyeing the large queue behind her. She finds it, and I scan the rewards card. She grabs her bag and tries to leave.)

Me: “Ma’am, I’m sorry but we’re not quite finished yet. I still need payment.”

Woman: “I JUST PAID YOU! What are you talking about?”

Me: “No, that was just our rewards card. I still need a payment card or cash for the items.”

Woman: “I don’t have a card! My husband has it!”

(At this point she just walks away, so I void off the sale and start helping the other customers. 10 minutes later however…)

Woman: “I got the card!”

Me: “Okay, great!” *rings items in again* “Go ahead and slide the card for debit, or insert the chip for credit.”

Woman: *stares* “What? What do you want me to do?”

Me: “Erm… is it debit or credit?”

Woman: “TOO MANY CHOICES! WHY ARE YOU GIVING ME TOO MANY CHOICES?! JUST TELL ME WHAT TO DO!”

Me: *trying not to laugh at this being too many choices* “Slide your card, and put in your PIN.”

Woman: “Why is it asking if I want cash? I don’t want cash! Why is it doing this?”

Me: “Just hit ‘no’ and you’ll be fine.”

Woman: *muttering*  “…too many choices…”

(The card got declined, which was fun to explain, and the best part was it turned out she had cash on her the whole time and ended up paying that way. What should have been a one minute transaction took nearly 20 minutes total overall, all while trying to politely ignore the overwhelming smell of urine. Who knew debit cards were so complicated?)