Don’t Want To Be In His Robin Hood Anymore

(I didn’t grow up with my father, but due to court-ordered visits, I have to see him every other weekend. I am watching ‘Teen Titans Go!’ with my little seven-year-old step-brother, who my father told me to watch while he takes a nap. I am a huge superhero fan. I am watching an episode where they have different Batman Robins on the show.)

Step-Brother: “Why does one of the Robins have red hair?”

(My father walks in and hears the red-haired Robin speak. Then he runs and turns off the TV.)

Dad: “H***, no! You guys are not watching a show where there is a clearly open gay character! It will turn you gay!”

Me: “Dad, that’s a girl! Carrie Kelley! She was one of the Robins!”

Dad: *laughs in my face* “All the different Robins are only boys. Don’t talk back to me about something you clearly don’t know anything about. You two are not allowed to watch the show again!”

Me: “How does being gay affect the character, anyway! Would you tell a police officer or firefighter they are not a true hero because they are gay?!”

Dad: “Well, I, um… I am taking you home! You are not allowed to be in my house when you talk to me that way.”

(I was fine with it!)