Relationships, romance, and break-ups!

Crossing The Line From Hangry To Unacceptable

, , , , , | Romantic | April 1, 2021

My boyfriend is about seven inches taller than me and much broader. We are on a six-hour car journey and we stop at a service station to get some petrol and some food. The queue for a popular burger chain is massively busy, so I recommend just buying some sandwiches which he insists against. We’re queueing for a while, and the whole time he complains incessantly. Then, he berates the young-looking cashier who’s already very apologetic when we get there. We order, she advises how long it’ll take, and then we stand to the side. My boyfriend is still complaining.

Me: “It’s busy, [Boyfriend]. Things are going to take time. It’s not their fault and certainly not that girl’s fault.”

Boyfriend: “It is their fault; they should have more workers!”

You can see that they have every station covered and the kitchen staff are running around trying to fill orders.

Me: “They have as many as they can. They’re working as hard as they can. That poor kid looked like she was about to cry.”

Boyfriend: “Good!”

Me: “Really?!”

Boyfriend: “Can’t handle it, don’t get a job like this. What is taking so long with the order?!”

Me: “It’s been a minute and a half!”

Boyfriend: “No, it’s been like… ten!”

Me: “No, that clock said 12:43 when we got to the cashier. It’s just turned 12:45.”

Boyfriend: More than a minute!”

Me: “A minute and a half is more than a minute, but okay. It’s now been two! But certainly not ten. She said it’ll take about five to ten minutes, so we wait for ten.”

He grumbles. About three minutes go by.

Boyfriend: “I’m gonna complain!”

Me: “We need to wait for another five before investigating.”

He actually stamps his foot.

Boyfriend: “NO!”

Me: *Taken aback* “[Boyfriend], company policy—”

He gets in my face and pokes my chest.

Boyfriend: “No! It’s been too long! I’m saying it’s been too long! You don’t get to decide that it’s not been! YOU DON’T TELL ME WHAT TO DO! Understand?”

I nod.

Boyfriend: “Answer me! DO. YOU. UNDERSTAND?”

Me: *Quietly* “Yes.”

Boyfriend: *Sharply* “Good.”

He notices people are looking at us and his voice and body language immediately soften.  

Boyfriend: “I… Sorry. Company policy?”

Me: *Still quietly* “I used to work for [Burger Chain] in [Hometown]. The policy is ten minutes if there are more than ten people that have ordered before they’ll investigate.”

Boyfriend: “Oh. Then… You take this. And I’ll. Walk. Yes.”

He handed me the receipt and headed off. Our food arrived in the next couple of minutes and it turned out he’d gone to get flowers plus some stuff he knew I liked to apologise to me. He said his behavior was due to hunger but that doesn’t make it okay. Being an idiot, I didn’t run for the hills but decided to take his word for it and accept his apology, eventually moving in with him. Please don’t ignore red flags; in the best-case scenario, you end up living with a parent at the age of thirty with an unhealthy, deep-rooted self-hatred.

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Money/Family Matters

, , , , | Romantic | March 27, 2021

My wife and I had similar upbringings but grew up with very different approaches to money. I save and am very risk-averse; she spends and enjoys it. We complement each other well; a few times a little extra savings has really helped us out, and if she didn’t push me to enjoy the money, we wouldn’t have the memories or experiences we have.

However, it can be a bind at times.

Wife: “I’m nipping out; I’m meeting [Friend] for a drink.”

Me: “Oh, sorry. I’ve had a drink already; I can’t drive you.”

Wife: “Oh, d***. It looks like rain, as well.”

Me: “Never mind. There should be cash upstairs in the bedroom. I keep it aside in case of things like this. You can take a taxi.”

Wife: “Oh! You were keeping it for a reason? I might have spent that on shopping.”

Me: *Sigh* “No worries. I have some change that might get you a taxi.”

Wife: “The change you had in the top drawer?”

Me: “…”

Wife: “Yeah, I spent that, too. Sorry.”

Me: “Might want to take an umbrella, then.”

She had to walk and did get drenched, but she still had a good time with her friend. I restocked the cash and she hasn’t “borrowed” it yet.

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Somebody’s Being A Real Tool Here

, , , , | Romantic | March 23, 2021

I do a lot of work around the house — repairs and DIY. I have been thinking about building some fitted wardrobes, so when my wife keeps pushing me for ideas for my upcoming birthday, a new battery drill would be perfect.

I’ve only ever had cheap unbranded tools before, so I pick out a really affordable brand-name drill and even send her a picture of the one I specifically want.

A few weeks later, I open a very heavy box to find… an unbranded version.

Wife: “They didn’t have the one you wanted, so I got this one. Look, it comes with all these tools.”

It comes with some cheap drill bits.

Me: “Thank you. I have to admit, I was hoping for the other one.”

Wife: “They’re the same, aren’t they?”

Me: “Not really, no. I  was really looking for one with a bit more power. Plus, I think I mentioned that I was hoping to buy more [Brand] products and just have the one battery.”

Wife: “I think you’re just being picky.”

Me: “I’m not trying to be ungrateful, but this just won’t do the job.”

Wife: *In a huff* “Well, I guess I can return it.”

I felt bad, but we have always said that we would rather get each other something we actually wanted, and I have done the same for her in the past.

After several months of her “forgetting” or “not having time” to return the drill, she let me know she had lost the receipt and couldn’t return it.

I used the new drill for the first time, and I think it’s worse than my old one. It struggles to drill any large hole and the charge time is rubbish. 

I’m still the bad guy if I use my old drill. I think I will buy my own tools from now on.

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Bad Translations Will Undo Close-Knit Families

, , , , | Romantic | March 19, 2021

A knitting pattern and some wool I ordered arrive.

Me: *To my boyfriend* “Crap. The pattern is exclusively in French. Do we know anyone who knits and speaks French?”

Boyfriend: “Why? You speak French; just translate it yourself.”

Me: “This pattern is full of specific knitting terms and abbreviations. I have literally no clue what this part says.”

Boyfriend: “Then use a translation app. That will work.”

I put the text through a translation app and read it over.

Me: “I don’t think this is going to work. I’ll just find another pattern I can use this wool for.”

Boyfriend: “It can’t be that bad. I am sure you can figure it out with the translation.”

Me: “The translated pattern literally tells me to ‘End with your in-laws’ five times. I have no clue what they want me to do, but I am pretty sure the pattern doesn’t want me visiting your parents.”

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Too Much Sugar Isn’t Good For You

, , , , | Romantic | March 12, 2021

I make a post on a website explaining that I’ve lost my job, asking for donations to help me cut down on debt while I search for a job and offering “adoptables” — premade character designs — to people who don’t want to give something for nothing. Usually, when I make posts like this on one particular site, I wind up getting offers from sugar daddies or people trying to ask for my bank details, so I add a disclaimer to my post saying no thanks and no way.

The next day, I sign in to find a message in my inbox.

Stranger: “Hello, how are you doing today? I’m [Stranger] from Michigan. I hope you are well, and nice meeting you. Your profile hits home with me and I like that you seem relaxed and very open. If you would not mind, I’d like you to be my sugar baby. I promise to pay $700 twice a week. Here’s my number [redacted] and my Kik is [redacted]; you can text me. Hoping to read from you soon.”

Me: “So, which part stuck out to you more: the part where my profile says I’m married and monogamous, or my recent post saying I’m not looking for a sugar daddy?”

For reasons man may never know, he didn’t reply.

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