The Quickest Way To A Man’s Heart

| New York, NY, USA | Romantic | December 6, 2011

(My boyfriend and I are finishing our meal, and he tells me what he thinks of his food.)

Boyfriend: “You know what I love?”

Me: “What?”

Boyfriend: “Avocado. Know what else I love?”

Me: “What else?”

Boyfriend: “Eel! Know what else I love?”

(He then looks at me as if the answer to this question should be extremely obvious.)

Me: “Me?”

Boyfriend: “That, too. I was actually going to say soy sauce, though.”

Not Just The Key To My Heart

| Canada | Romantic | December 5, 2011

(I am talking online to my boyfriend.)

Me: “Do you still love me?”

Boyfriend: “It’s not like I have a choice.”

Me: “Why?”

Boyfriend: “You have half my heart.”

Me: “Aww!”

Boyfriend: “And the keys to my apartment.”

Children Start With The Breast Intentions

| Indiana, USA | Romantic | December 5, 2011

(I am eating with my girlfriend. There is a family of four at the table on the other side of us. I notice something odd about one of the kids at the other side of the table.)

Me: “Uh, sweetie.”

Girlfriend: “Yes?”

Me: *whispering* “I think that little kid over there is looking at your chest.”

(She motions her eyes to the other table, where a boy, around 5 years old watches us. My girlfriend looks at him with a slightly odd stare.)

Me: “They start young.”

Not Always Romantic: Android App

Android | Romantic | December 5, 2011

Introducing Not Always Romantic’s Official Android App!

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All You Need Is Love, And Minions

| California, USA | Romantic | December 5, 2011

(My girlfriend is a science major. We often joke about her being a mad scientist who will take over the world. We’re in different parts of the state for summer break. She’s working backstage with a local singing group.)

Girlfriend: “Miss you too. I’m working backstage today. Friday and Saturday. So much singing!”

Me: “Oh, I didn’t know. Have fun.”

Girlfriend: “No worries. I forgot to tell you, and I have minions to do the work anyways.”

Me: “Yay, minions! When we take over the world I’ll make sure you always have minions.”

Girlfriend: “Yay! I love minions. But not as much as I love you.”

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