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Relationships, romance, and break-ups!

Warning: Honesty Cuts Both Ways

| Romantic | September 23, 2011

(I’m on the phone with my boyfriend. We go to college together, but are apart for the summers. It is one week before we return for the fall semester.)

Me: “You really should get a haircut before we go back to school.”

Him: “I was going to wait until we get back, so that you can cut it.”

Me: “Awww, you like the way I cut your hair? How sweet!”

Him: “No, it’s just cheaper.”

Not A Pretty Slight

| Romantic | September 22, 2011

(At the grocery store, a boy at the seafood counter is very flirty and smiling constantly. Here’s what happens when I return to the car with my boyfriend.)

Me: “Jesus, baby, the guy in there was looking at me like I was the prettiest girl in the world!”

Boyfriend: “Must have been a slow day!”

Return To (Relationship) Ender

| Romantic | September 22, 2011

Caller: “Hi, I’d like to order some flowers for delivery. I went on a date last night, and I’d like to show her I’m still thinking about her by sending her flowers.”

Me: “That’s sweet. what would you like?”

Caller: “I don’t know. What would you like?”

Me: “Well, you can’t go wrong with a dozen roses.”

Caller: “Sounds good. I’ll do that.”

Me: “Okay. How would you like to pay for that?”

Caller: “Cash on delivery.”

Me: “Wait a minute…you want to have flowers sent to your date, but you want her to pay for them?”

Caller: “Yeah, so? Can we do that?”

Settling For Yes

| Romantic | September 21, 2011

(I’m talking to my mom about her marriage to my stepdad.)

Me: “I’m glad stepdad and I finally got you to say yes to marrying him, mom. We only had to ask six times!”

Mom: “Yeah, well…”

Me: “So, what made you change your mind?”

(A dreamy, in-love look comes across my mom’s face.)

Mom: “I just finally realized that he was the best I could do.”

Me: *trying not to laugh* “I probably wouldn’t tell him that, mom…”

A Thread Giveaway

| Romantic | September 21, 2011

(A man comes to my till to buy a roll of satin ribbon. In his other hand, he is holding a tiny gift box of the kind used for jewellery.)

Me: “Oh, are you buying this to tie around the box?”

Customer: *slightly unsure* “Yes?”

Me: “Would you like me to tie if for you?”

Customer: “Oh yes, please!”

(I tie the ribbon in a lovely bow around the box.)

Me: “How’s this?”

Customer: *worried* “It…it may be too good…”

Me: *confused silence*

Customer: “If you saw this would you…would you think it’s a ring?”

Me: “Um…”

Customer: “Would you think I was proposing? Because that wouldn’t be good.”

Me: “I think it’ll be okay.”

Customer: “Right. Well, if it all goes wrong, I’m coming back!”

(The customer leaves with his prettily tied box. So far, I haven’t seen him back. Hopefully this means I haven’t ruined his life!)