(It is not very busy, but we are short-staffed so everyone is working hard. My manager helps me bag a particularly big order.)

Me: “Okay, ma’am, I believe my manager and I got all of your food. But, just in case, let me go over your receipt again.”

Customer: “Okay.”

(We go over the receipt together and find everything is correct.)

Customer: “Thank you, dear.”

Me: “You are very welcome, ma’am!”

Manager: “Did you go over her order again before you let her leave?”

Me: “Yes!”

(Five minutes later a man walks in brandishing a receipt and yelling.)

Man: “You idiots messed up my order!”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir. Can I help you?”

Man: “Yeah, I came through drive-thru and didn’t get half of my order!”

(I look over the receipt and see it is from the previous customer that I just helped.)

Me: “Sir, I don’t think this is your order. I packed this order a few minutes ago, and it was for a lady on counter.”

Man: “How dare you accuse me of lying! I want to talk to your manager!”

Me: “Fine.”

(The manager proceeds to tell him the same thing, but he won’t stop screaming at her. Eventually, he demands to see the store manager.)

Store Manager: “What seems to be the problem, sir?”

Man: “Look, I came through the drive-thru. This is my receipt, but your stupid employees won’t give me my food!”

Store Manager: “Well, sir, I am certain this is not your receipt.”

Man: “Oh yeah? Prove it!”

Store Manager: “Well, the top of the receipt says the order was taken from the register at the counter, which means it could not have been for a drive-thru order. And, according to the receipt, this was ‘Katie’s’ order. You don’t look like a ‘Katie.'”

Man: *thinks for a minute, then leaves defeated*

This story is part of our Scammer roundup!

Want to read the next story? Click here!

Want to see the roundup? Click here!

(It’s the 4th of July, and I’m 9.5 hours into my 10-hour shift. For the umpteenth time today, a customer asks why I’m working on the 4th of July.)

Me: “Welcome to [Credit Card] customer service. My name is [My Name]. How may I help you?”

Customer: “Why the h*** are you at work on Independence Day?! Are you even American?”

Me: “Yes, sir, I was born and raised in Florida. How can I help you?”

Customer: “If you’re really an American, you wouldn’t be working today. You’d be celebrating our nation’s freedom!”

Me: “You know, I’d love to be with the rest of my family enjoying the festivities and fireworks, not to mention the food, but I’m here working to support my family. And, I wouldn’t be working if YOU weren’t calling.”

Customer: “Oh… I never thought of it that way.”

Me: “No one ever does. How can I help you?”

This story is part of our July 4th roundup!

Want to read the next story? Click here!

Want to read the roundup? Click here!

(I am a caucasian female working as a concierge in a hotel in Chicago, but I grew up in Korea. This particular group of guests has been causing havoc their entire stay, stealing items and bothering other patrons in the halls. One night, the television in the lounge has been smashed, so my boss calls the police on them. They are sitting on the sofa while the officer is trying to get their details. Before every answer, the guests converse amongst themselves in Korean.)

Officer: “Where are you boys from?”

Guest #1: *in Korean* “Tell him we’re from Japan!”

Guest #2: “Uh, Japan. Yeah.”

Me: *in perfect Korean* “You guys better tell him the truth. He’s going to find out anyway.”

(They are in shock. But before they sputter out an excuse, the policeman says…)

Officer: *in perfect Korean* “That’s okay. We’ll get it from their passports.”

(And that was how I met my now fiancé. The guests, by the way, spent the rest of the night at HIS workplace instead of mine.)

(My mother needs a new cellphone plan, and I agree to tag along with her. Please note that my mom is in her mid 60s, five feet tall, and incredibly sweet and polite, especially to strangers.)

Sales Rep: “Hi! How can I help you today?”

Mom: “Hello! It seems I need to update my cell phone plan, if that’s not too much trouble.”

Sales Rep: “Of course not. I’d be happy to assist you with that. *looks up my mom’s account* “Ah, okay, it looks like we no longer offer your original plan, so let’s go over your new options…”

(Without warning, my mother mutates into a Nightmare Customer from Hades.)

Mom: “I DON’T WANT A NEW PLAN! I LIKED THE OLD PLAN! WHY DON’T YOU OFFER IT ANYMORE?! THIS IS HORRIBLE SERVICE!”

Sales Rep: *visibly startled* “I’m… I’m sorry, ma’am, but if you’ll take a look at our current plans, I’m sure we’ll find you a great deal on something that…”

Mom: “Why are you doing this to me? Your company obviously doesn’t care about its customers! Fix this situation immediately, or I’m taking my business elsewhere!”

(At this point, everyone in the store is staring at us, and the sales rep looks like she may start crying.)

Me: “Mother, what is wrong with you?! Why are you acting like this?”

Mom: *suddenly herself again* “Oh dear, nothing’s wrong at all! But if a store has a policy you don’t like, what you do is get really mean with the salespeople and take out your aggression on them. Then the salespeople call their corporate headquarters to inform the CEO that a customer is unhappy, and the policy gets changed!”

(She smiles brightly. The store is silent as both customers and employees attempt to process her logic.)

Me: *to the sales rep* “We’ll take this plan right here, and I’ll explain everything else to her in the car…”

Me: “Hi, welcome to [Restaurant’s Name]. How can I help you?”

Customer: “Yes, I’ll have—”

(The customer finally makes eye contact and then stares at me for a couple of seconds.)

Me: “Ma’am? Is everything all right?”

Customer: “Your eyes…”

(I typically get compliments on my blue eyes, so I just smile.)

Me: “Thank you. What can I get for you?”

(The customer is still transfixed on my eyes.)

Customer: *slowly* “Are… they real?”

Me: “Um, yes.”

Customer: “Are they yours?”

Me: *laughing* “No, I stole them from a corpse.”

(I realize that she thinks I’m serious.)

Me: “They’re my real eyes! I was born with them.”

Customer: “Are you sure?”

Me: “Positive.”

Customer: *orders and quickly leaves, staring cautiously at my eyes the whole time*