Right Working Romantic Related Learning Friendly Healthy Legal Inspirational Unfiltered
The customer is NOT always right!

Time To Bring Out The Iron Maiden

, , , | Right | April 18, 2008

(I have three tables of teenagers. Everyone seems to understand that this restaurant is themed. We don’t let people use forks, knives, or spoons. You use your hands, end of story.)

Male Customer: “My friend here wants to know how she eats the soup.”

(I look to his friend and sigh to myself.)

Me: “You grab the handle of the bowl, bring it to your mouth, and then sip. Use two hands if it’s too heavy.”

Female Customer: “Okay.”

(She lifts the bowl to her face, but instead of just going for a sip, she turns her head in on it so her nose ends up going in the soup. She flips.)

Female Customer: “Are you s***ting me?! This is bulls***! I shouldn’t have to eat like this! It’s so… so–”

Me: “Medieval.”

(Her friends snicker.)

Female Customer: “Yeah, it is! And I think it’s unfair that I don’t get any utensils! Are you sure I can’t get a fork for my soup?”

Me: “Wait a second; did you just say, ‘fork’? I’m not sure about you, but usually, a spoon works better for me. Also, they don’t exist here.”

(Everyone laughs at her.)

Female Customer: “Fine, fine, I’ll eat with my hands, I guess. If you ask me, it’s just stupid.”

Me: “It’s a part of the experience.”

Female Customer: “But maybe I don’t want the experience!”

(And it’s moments like that, and many others, that make me wonder why anyone would waste 80 bucks for a themed restaurant and not want the experience.)


This story is part of our Soup roundup!

Read the next Soup roundup story!

Read the Soup roundup!

1 Thumbs
2,773

Virgin Galactic, Eat Your Heart Out

, , , , | Right | April 18, 2008

(I’m a flight attendant doing my pre-takeoff check-in the cabin. A man stops me and gestures to the small digital camera sitting in the seat next to him.)

Passenger: “Is it okay if my camera is here for the flight?”

Me: “Sure, sir. That will be fine.”

Passenger: “But shouldn’t I put it in the overhead bin?”

Me: “It should be fine there, but if you’re worried about it falling on the floor during landing you could put it in the overhead bin.”

Passenger: “But after takeoff, won’t it start floating around the cabin?”

Me: “Well, sir, just hold on to it. Once we slingshot around the moon, it will be fine.”

1 Thumbs
5,218

Granny Git Your Groove On

, , | Right | April 18, 2008

Old Woman: “Excuse me, sir, I need some batteries.”

Me: “Of course. What kind do you need?”

Old Woman: “I… I’m not sure.”

Me: “Not a problem. What do you need the batteries for? I might be able to match them up to the product.”

Old Woman: “…I need them for my ghetto blaster.”

1 Thumbs
1,381

Time For A Tenth Circle Of H*ll

, , , | Right | April 18, 2008

(I was working checkout, in the express lane (15 items or less). A lady with a very full trolley comes up.)

Lady: “Hi! Is this an express lane?”

Me: “Yep. You might want to go through another–”

Lady: *starts unloading stuff* “Good. I’m in a hurry.”

Me: “?!”

1 Thumbs
1,736

Not So Sweet Toothed

, , , , | Right | April 17, 2008

(The bakery has just closed. I just clocked out, and am on my way out of the store.)

Lady: “Excuse me, could you decorate this cake for me?”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. My shift is over, and the bakery is closed.”

Lady: “But I need it done for tomorrow! If you don’t do it, I’ll call your manager!”

Me: “Ma’am, what do you do for a living?”

Lady: “I’m a dentist.”

Me: “Would you like to look at my teeth after your shift ends, for free?”

Lady: “That’s different. My job is hard. Anyone could do your job.”

Me: “Then you won’t mind taking that cake home and decorating it yourself.”

1 Thumbs
11,888