(I am working on reception, doing 11-hour shifts to cover the Christmas break.)

Me: “Hello!”

Customer: “Good morning.”

(He hands me his membership cards.)

Me: “Are these for the gym?”

(We are a leisure centre so we have other facilities in the building, plus I don’t recognise him. We are a small centre and have our regulars.)

Customer: “Yes! And I am still waiting for you to say ‘Good Morning’ back!”

(He just glared at me and made me feel like a piece of crap. Out of nervousness, I laughed, then swiped his card, said ‘good morning,’ and took his debit card payment. He snatched the card out of my hand, grunted, and went off to the gym. I mouthed at my colleague who was standing behind him ‘what a dick!’ which made me feel better. No need for people to be like that.)

(In line at a popular chain coffee shop, I can overhear the cashier telling customers that the previous customer has paid for their drinks – “pay it forward” – and each customer is then paying for the next customer. The lady in front of me makes her order, and then it comes time to pay.)

Cashier: “The customers are doing ‘Pay It Forward’ today. Your drink has been paid for by the last customer!

Lady: “Oh, that’s so nice! Thank you!” *leaves*

Cashier: *to me* “Wow. I… I’m so sorry. Everyone else has carried this on.”

Me: “No problem. I’ll take a—”

(I try to hand the cashier a $5 but she holds out her hand.)

Cashier: “Wait, I might be able to make it from the change pot.”

(She takes the cup that she’s been dropping odd change into, and proceeds to count out small change. There is just enough for my drink.)

Cashier: *with a huge smile* “There! Your drink has been paid for!”

Me: “Thank you! Here, pay it forward.” *I hand her the $5 and she puts it into the change pot for the next customer*

Cashier: “Thank you SO much! Happy holidays!”

(I am working the returns desk after Christmas. Our company has a somewhat flexible return policy; you are allotted store credit if you do not have a receipt. However, you will be given credit worth the most recent sale price, since we have no way of knowing when the item was purchased.)

Customer: “I’d like to return this lamp.” *she places it violently on the counter*

Me: “Certainly! If I could just scan your receipt—”

Customer: “I don’t f****** have it.”

Me: *taken aback, but friendly* “Oh, that’s all right. I can give you store credit.”

(The customer nods sullenly. I process the return and tell her the total; around $18.)

Customer: “You’re s***ing me! I paid $20 for that lamp!”

Me: “Sorry. You’re right, it’s selling for $20 right now, but since you have no receipt, and we can’t tell when you purchased it or what you paid, you’re automatically given the most recent sale price, and this product was $2 off last week.”

Customer: “Well, that’s f****** bull-s***!” *she takes the lamp and storms out*

(Most people are just happy to get anything back at all without a receipt!)

Customer: “Can I return this item without a receipt? It was a Christmas gift and I don’t want it.”

Me: “You can, but it’ll ring up at the lowest price it’s been over the last 90 days, and I know that was on sale a few weeks ago, so you’ll be getting that sale price back for it.”

Customer: “But I’m pretty sure he paid full price for it. It’s not my fault your store doesn’t issue gift receipts.”

Me: “We still issue regular receipts, and we let people go past the regular 30 day return policy if it was a Christmas gift.”

Customer: “Yeah, but I don’t have the receipt, so why can’t you give me the full price for it?”

Me: “Because that’s how our system works. Without a receipt, it comes up at the lowest price it’s been sold at, whether it was from a sale or a price match to a different store.”

Customer: “This is ridiculous! I don’t want it!”

Me: “Can you ask the person who gave it to you for the receipt?”

Customer: “No!”

Me: “Then that’s all we can do.”

Customer: “This is so STUPID! I’m going somewhere else to take it back.”

Me: *to myself* “And that’s why return policies are a thing.”

(It’s a couple of days after Christmas and we’re getting a lot of items returned to our store. A man comes up to me holding a small car – only a few centimetres long – and a remote control.)

Man: “Hi, my kids got this for Christmas, but it doesn’t work – it only drives backwards. Can I switch it out for another one?”

Me: “Of course! Right this way.”

(I take him to our section of remote controlled toys. We sell a few cars that are the same size as the one he’s carrying and I start looking at these, picking them up to identify which one he has.)

Man: “No, it was a car from this.”

(To my surprise, he points to a large set which includes tracks, two cars, and two controls, which goes for $120. My eyes widen.)

Me: “Sir, I’m sorry, but you’ll have to bring the entire toy in to exchange.”

Man: “What? But why?”

Me: “Because it was sold as one unit, sir; it needs to be returned as one unit.”

Man: “But it’s just the car that doesn’t work.”

Me: “I’m sorry; we need the whole thing to return it.”

Man: “Can’t you just open this box and give me one of the cars from it?”

Me: “No, sir, I cannot. You’ll have to return the entire set to exchange for a new one.”

(He walked off looking annoyed that he couldn’t just get the car itself. I laughed about it with my coworkers afterwards.)