Customer: “I need to get a repeat on my medication. I’ve ran out of the script so can you give me an owning? I’ve been here many times.”

Me: “Sure, that shouldn’t be a problem. Can you give me your name and the name of the medication you want owning?”

Customer: “My name is [Customer] and I don’t know what the medication is called.”

Me: “Oh, okay. Do you know what the medication is for?”

Customer; “No. Just look up the medication I’m on.”

Me: “You’re on a few different medications.”

Customer: “It’s a little white tablet.”

Me: “All but one of the five medications you are on are white. Box or bottle?”

Customer: “No idea. Just give me an owing.”

Me: “Sir, sorry, but without know what the medication is for or what it is called, I cannot give you an owing. But would you know what it is if I showed you the packages it comes in?.”

(I quickly grab a few bottles and boxes of medications that the customer is on, hoping it jogs his memory.)

Customer: “Nope. I don’t know which one it is. Just give me an owing. It’s a little white pill! You’re suppose to know what I want!”

Me: “Sir, as I said, a few of your medications you are on are small white pills., I’m sorry but I want to make sure I am giving you the right medication. Are you sure you don’t know what the medication is called or what it is used for?”

Customer: “You’re no help. You’re suppose to know what I want!”  *leaves the store*

(I overhear this conversation between a coworker on register and a customer.)

Customer: *puts almond milk on counter* “Hi. Can you tell me if this tastes sweet?”

Coworker: *begins reading ingredients* “Well, it looks like the second ingredient is high fructose corn syrup, so—”

Customer: “I don’t care about that! I just want to know if it tastes sweet!“

(I’m working on the tills and I am approached by a woman holding a packet of crisps. She doesn’t put them on the belt but holds them out to me. She has the look of a very stern headmistress.)

Customer: “I found this on the shelf reduced to 10p. They went off at the end of last month.”

Me: “Ah, yes. We reduced it because it was near the expiration date.”

Customer: “It is illegal to reduce stock after it has expired. Did you know that?”

Me: “It was likely reduced as it neared the best-before date to clear it off the shelves. We are allowed to sell stock which is nearing or has gone past its best-before date up to a month afterwards.”

Customer: *in a patronising tone* “Really? Well, that’ll be something interesting to write in my blog.”

(She strutted off looking very superior. For a few seconds, I stared after her, still holding the crisps. Behind her a male customer was trying his hardest not to laugh. I checked with a supervisor later and he clarified what I had said; we throw away stock which has reached the use-by date, but we can sell stock one month after the best-before date. We broke no laws, and hopefully the woman did her research and realised that before she wrote her blog!)

(We offer to cash checks in our store, provided the customer holds or signs up for a rewards membership and has a photo ID, and we have the cash to do so. This happens in the evening only an hour before we close.)

Me: “Hello, sir, how can I help you?”

Customer: “Yeah, I need to cash this check. Hurry up, though; I have to be somewhere.”

(I take a look at the check. It is for over $700, which is more than twice what I have available in my drawer. During the day we can get loans from the cash office, but as it’s quite late, I am not able to. )

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but I don’t have enough cash on hand to cash this.”

Customer: “Well, then, get it! You guys do it all the time!”

Me: “Again, sir, I’m sorry. But it’s too late for me to get a loan. You can take the check somewhere else to cash, or you can wait and see if we have the money tomorrow. It’s unlikely I will be able to cash it later tonight, as we close in an hour. You could also try tomorrow.”

Customer: “Man! The f*** is this?! Just give me my d*** money!”

Me: “Again, sir, I’m not able to. I have given you alternatives. Perhaps you can try [Grocery Store] across the street? They tend to have more on hand at this time of night.”

(The customer swears under his breath and leaves. He comes back five minutes later after I have helped two more customers.)

Customer: “You going to cash my check now?”

Me: “Again, sir, I don’t have enough. We close in less than an hour; I won’t be able to—”

(The customer leaves again. He then comes back AGAIN a few minutes later.)

Customer: “You got it yet?”

Me: “Sir, please, I will not be able to cash your check tonight! You can go somewhere else, or wait until tomorrow! You are asking me to do something I am literally unable to do.”

(By this point my manager has heard all of this and comes over. He asks to see the check and, despite it being against company policy, agrees to check and see if there is enough cash in the office to do the transaction. He asks the customer for ID.)

Customer: “I ain’t got no ID; that’s why I can’t go to [Check Cashing Store] or the bank! Now give me my money!”

(My manager makes him leave. The customer tries to resist, but my manager is about 6’5″ and very broad, built like a linebacker, and weighs at least 260 pounds.)

Manager: “You don’t feel bad about that one bit. You did good. Start closing up; maybe we can go home early tonight.”

(With that, he walked away, whistling. Just goes to show: don’t mess with retail workers!)

(I work at a coffee store inside a very busy mall. It’s Labor Day. This conversation happens about once every two minutes:)

Customer: “Wow. I can’t believe you have to work on Labor Day! I’m sorry!”

Me: “It’s okay! Maybe someday everyone will stop coming so all of us in the mall can have the day off, too!”

(Everyone I said that to looked so embarrassed as they looked around and realized we were absolutely slammed and it was their fault we were all there on a holiday.)

This story is part of our Labor Day roundup!

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