Third Time’s A Charm

, | | Right | November 8, 2007

(Our mall opens at ten, so the restaurant does not serve breakfast.)

Customer: *gazes at menu board* “I’d like a [Breakfast Sandwich], please.”

Me: “Ma’am, I’m sorry, we don’t serve breakfast at this location.”

(Customer, still gazing at menu, which lists no breakfast items.)

Customer: “Well, can I get an order of [Breakfast Platter]?”

Me: “Ma’am, we do not serve breakfast here since we can’t open before ten.”

(Customer ceases looking at menu board gazes at me for a moment.)

Customer: “You don’t serve breakfast?”

Me: “Uh… no.”

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Someone Needs A Trip To The Warhol Museum

, , | | Right | November 8, 2007

(Note: this customer is yelling at me over something stupid in the first place…)

Customer: *pause* “Who is that on your shirt?”

Me: *slightly taken aback by the change in subject* “Ernesto “Che” Guevara.”

Customer: “Who is that?”

Me: “A Cuban revolutionary.”

Customer: “My husband is Cuban… Would he know about that guy?”

Me: “Yeah.”

(Customer calls her husband and talks to him for a second)

Customer: “My husband says he is a communist. Are you a communist?!”

Me: “Only on paper, ma’am.”

Customer: *blink blink* “I don’t get it!”

Me: “I didn’t think you would.”

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My, Aren’t We Feeling Ethnocentric Today?

| | Right | November 7, 2007

Travel Store Customer: “Do you have any globes that have the United States bigger? I don’t need all this Africa, I just really want the US and Europe.”

Source

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… And We Wonder Why Everyone Hates Us

, | | Right | November 7, 2007

Customer: “Are you Hispanic?”

Me: “No.”

Customer: “Middle Eastern?”

Me: “No.”

Customer: “Egyptian?”

Me: “No.”

Customer: “What are you?”

Me: “Chinese.”

(customer puts on offended face)

Customer: “I don’t appreciate you treating me like I’m dumb.”

Me: “Excuse me? I’m being honest.”

Customer: “NO CHINESE PERSON WOULD EVER HAVE EYES AS BIG AS YOURS!!!”

Me: *mouth wide open*

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Because Everything’s Bigger In Texas

, | | Right | November 7, 2007

(Note: the shop is really, really small, and is inside the same building as a supermarket.)

*lady walks into store with shopping cart*

Me: “Excuse me, ma’am, could you leave your cart outside? It’s blocking other people from getting inside the store.”

Lady: *moves her cart filled with unpaid merchandise outside the store*

Me: “I’m sorry, you can’t take unpaid merchandise outside the store either.”

Lady: “I’m sorry. I’m from Texas!”

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