Funny stories about family

Ah, Mothers, Part 6

| Related | December 11, 2011

(The child I’m working with is crying, so I go outside to talk to the mother.)

Me: “Your child seems to have some separation anxiety, ma’am. It’s against the rules, but I could let you stay and watch her work so she’ll feel better.”

Mother: “Oh, I think she’ll be fine after a while. See, she’s been upset since we moved here from Chicago.”

Me: “Yeah, that’s difficult for a child sometimes.”

Mother: “But don’t tell her we moved, okay? We told her we were only going on a vacation. She has no idea we’re not going back.”

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Ah, Mothers, Part 7

| Related | December 11, 2011

(I’m putting a bridal set on a mannequin. The bottom has a train on it and a little girl is pulling on it.)

Me: “Please don’t pull on that.”

Mother: “Oh, she’s fine.”

Me: “If she rips it, you have to pay for it.”

Mother: *bellowing at daughter* “DON’T TOUCH THAT!”

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The Lesser Of Teen Evils

, | Related | December 11, 2011

(A man and his two sons are checking out through my register. The younger of the two sons grabs a bag of Skittles from the candy selection.)

Son: “Dad, can I have some Skittles?”

Dad: “No. Teenage girls eat Skittles. And what are teenage girls?”

Both sons: *raising their little fists in the air* “EVIL!”

Also seen on Not Always Right

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Social Faux Pa Pa

, | Related | December 11, 2011

Child: “Daddy! Look at this!”

(The father comes over to find his child looking at an adult magazine.)

Father: *to me* “What the h*** is wrong with you? How can you let a 6-year-old boy look at this smut?!”

Me: *ringing up another customer* “Sir, I’m with another customer right now.”

Father: *waving the magazine in my face* “He is way too young for this! Why didn’t you stop him from looking at this?” *he starts screaming obscenities*

(My manager walks by as this is happening.)

Manager: “Sir, she is a cashier, not a babysitter. It is not her job to watch your child, it is yours. She was doing her job when you came up to scream at her. Now get out before I call the police.”

(The man looks embarrassed as he leads his son out. A minute later, he walks back in.)

Father: *mumbles* “I forgot my other son.”

Also seen on Not Always Right

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Mommy Says All Men Are Evil

| Related | December 11, 2011

(A three-year-old boy is playing with some dolls at the day care center and separating them into families.)

Boy: “And this is the mommy, and this is the daughter, and this is the other mommy, and this is the son and the daughter, and this is the other mommy–”

Worker: “Where are all the daddies?”

Boy: “They’re in jail.”

Also seen on Not Always Right

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