(It’s May 20th, 2005, and ‘Star Wars: Episode III’ has come out.)

Dad: “Hey, we’re thinking of going to see Star Wars. Do you want to come?”

Me: “I saw it yesterday at midnight.”

Dad: “Yeah. Do you want to see it again?”

Me: “Sure. I can keep Mom from getting confused.”

(My mom is not terribly good about remembering plot elements, but my parents have been Star Wars fans since 1977.)

Dad: “She’ll be fine.”

Me: “Yeah, sure. She told me after Episode I that she’s glad Senator Palpatine is on their side.”

(Dad laughs. We go to the movie theater and an hour into the movie, nice Senator Palpatine has just murdered four Jedi, and named Anakin Skywalker, Darth Vader. He pulls up his hood.)

Dad: “ OH MY GOSH; IT’S THAT GUY?!”

(Note: I am around six or seven years old, and I’m examining a rack of flowers for a bouquet for Mother’s Day. I need around fourteen dollars for the cheapest one.)

Me: “$9.00… $9.50… $9.75…”

(Another gentleman looking at flowers notices me.)

Gentleman: “Do you have enough?”

Me: “I’m not sure… is this enough?”

(I hand him my money, and he smiles, adding a few coins while I’m not looking.)

Gentleman: “It is now! You pick a nice one for your mum.”

(I thank him for ‘counting’ my money and pick a bouquet, then go up to the counter to pay.)

Cashier: “Alright sweetie, that’ll be [amount].”

Me: *hands her my change*

Cashier: “I’m sorry, but this isn’t quite enough. You’re a dollar off.”

Me: “Oh… I’m sorry.”

(As I start to leave, the cashier calls me back.)

Cashier: “Wait! Come back here, little lady!

(She pulls out a twenty from her pocket, pays for the flowers, and hands me back all my money.)

Cashier: “I think you’ve got it now. Here’s your change! Now, you wait here for a couple minutes. Once I’m done with the gentleman behind you, I’ll help you write out a nice card for your mum and we’ll wrap these flowers for you so she doesn’t see, okay?”

(My mum loved her flowers, and when I told her what happened she promptly went back and bought an expensive bouquet and some chocolates for the cashier that had helped me! Unfortunately we never saw the gentleman again to thank him.)

(Editor’s note: Not Always Related wishes you a Happy Mother’s Day!)

(I am visiting with my fiancée’s family. My fiancée’s two-year-old nephew is taking one person at a time by the hand, leading them into his grandmother’s room, playing with them a bit, then coming back out. He’s got a big foam sword he’s carrying around everywhere. Finally it’s my turn.)

Me: “Oh, I get to go see what’s going on in there now?”

Nephew: “Yeah!”

(We go in, but rather than the rampant running around and sword fighting he’s been doing with everyone else, he starts peeking into corners under the bed.)

Me: “Hey, what are you doing there, buddy?”

Nephew: “Kiw da wabbit.”

Me: “Kill the wabbit!? With your speaw and magic hewmet?”

(His face lights up like the fourth of July, and he starts laughing.)

Nephew: “Yeah!”

(He’s being raised on ‘Lord of the Rings’, ‘Conan the Barbarian’ and ‘Legend of Zelda’, and now ‘Looney Tunes’. He’s the nicest, friendliest kid I’ve ever met. He knows not to rough-house with someone who’s ‘unarmed’. I love my new family!)

(My mom, stepdad, brother, close friend, and I are at a popular restaurant. I am a transgendered female to male, and my friend is also male. This makes my mom the only woman at the table. Mom is not 100% okay with my transition.)

Waitress: “Okay, so are we all ready?”

(We all nod.)

Waitress: “Sweet! Okay, so ladies first!”

(She turns to my mom. My mom looks at me.)

Me: “Well, mom, aren’t you ready to order yet?”

(My mom blushes.)

Mom: “Oh, I guess you meant me!”

(I think that was the first day that mom really realized I am not a girl.)

This story is part of the Transgender-themed roundup!

Read the next Transgender-themed roundup story!

Read the Transgender-themed roundup!

(The weather has been nice, but the forecast is calling for evening rain showers.)

Me: “Hey, mom, it’s supposed to rain, so don’t forget to close the storms.”

(We have wooden sills, and the rain can damage them. Hours later, I come downstairs for a snack, only to hear the rain on the front walk.)

Me: “Mom! The storms! You forgot to close the storms!”

(I’m running through the house trying to close all of them, when I notice she hasn’t lifted a finger to open a single one.)

Me: “You ignored me just so I’d do all the work, didn’t you!?”

Mom: *cackles evilly*

Related:
A Storm Of Protest