Putting Yourself Into A Tight Spot

(I am getting changed to go for a run, in preparation for a trip to Australia.)

Me: “See, this is why I have to go running. I was wearing these shorts last summer and now I can’t even get them over my thighs, let alone do up the button!”

Boyfriend: “Yeah, but they were ridiculously tight anyway.”

(I just stare at him.)

Boyfriend: “What, no! You’re putting horrible words in my mouth! I never said that!”

(I continue to stare.)

Boyfriend: “I…uh…” *runs out of the room panicking*