Put The Matter To Bed

Me: “Hey Mum, I know why you’re so grumpy all the time. This article says that people who sleep on the right side of their partner are more grumpy, and those who sleep on the left are generally more happy.”

Dad: “Sounds about right!”

Mum: “No! I don’t know who sleeps on the left side of our bed. You sleep in the middle!”

Dad: “Just because I like snuggling!”

Mum: “I wish you wouldn’t snuggle. You take up all my space! Stop being so affectionate at night!”