Push The Machine’s Buttons, Not Mine!

I worked with a man who was either incompetent or sexist (or both). He always asked the women in the office to make his copies, get his dry cleaning, or fetch coffee, despite none of us being his secretary.

I was at my desk, which just happened to be near — but not beside — the copy machine. 

Coworker: “I need forty copies of this.”

He dropped a stack of papers on my desk. I looked at the copier.

Me: “Looks like it’s available.”

Coworker: “So, make my copies?”

Me: “I am busy doing my job.”

Coworker: “And you can’t take two minutes to make copies?”

Me: “In the time we’ve had this conversation, you could have made your own copies.”

Coworker: “So could you! Oh, my God! Are you so lazy?!”

Me: “Your secretarial work is not in my job description.”

He snatched the papers from my desk and stormed off to Human Resources. I half-expected them to either tell me to do it to end the argument or ask me to show him how (which would still be me doing it for him). Fortunately, they basically told him that he had been around enough copying machines that he should know how they work.